by Mikey Rox
‘Round my parts in New York City, winter’s been a breeze so far. Seventy degrees on Christmas Eve? I’ll take it. But I don’t expect the New Year to be as cooperative. When the post-holiday season throws us a storm or three, give it a good what-for with booze. Settle in for a DVR’s worth of critically acclaimed TV and these seven new drinking games to help smooth that slow transition to spring.
- The Golden Globes (NBC)
Take a sip of beer or wine when:
- A celebrity name-drops the designers they’re wearing on the red carpet. Fingers crossed for more Christian Siriano.
- Host Ricky Gervais makes the audience squirm with his too-close-for-comfort comedy. Shots will be fired in the first 60 seconds.
- The films Carol, Room, The Big Short or The Danish Girl win an award – for anything. Excellent films all of them, and awesome LGBT representation in the mix.
Take a shot when:
- Anybody takes a shot at Donald Trump. In which case, you may want to pick up a bottle of the good stuff.
- The “In Memoriam” segment inevitably forgets somebody it shouldn’t have. Twitter will let you know who it is, like, 30 seconds later.
- Amy Schumer and Jennifer Lawrence play up their cutest-new-besties-ever love affair for the cameras.
- Younger (TVLand)
Take a sip of beer or wine when:
- The numbers 26 and 40 are spoken. It happens A LOT.
- The words “lesbian” and “vagina” are spoken – or getting it on.
- There’s any mention of social media platforms, like Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat, Tinder, Grindr, et al. Hey, it’s modern-day Brooklyn – what do you expect?
Take a shot when:
- Liza (Sutton Foster) and Josh’s (Nico Tortorella) relationship seems like it’s in peril.
- Liza’s tries to keep her real age – or her college-aged daughter – a secret.
- Liza’s boss Diana (Miriam Shor) gives the stink-eye – while wearing a chunky necklace.
- Life in Pieces (CBS)
Take a sip of beer or wine when:
- Grandpa John (James Brolin) is a sexy beast. Move over, Sean Connery!
- Grandma Joan (Dianne Wiest) psychoanalyzes her children and/or their spouses.
- Parenting skills come into question.
Take a shot when:
- Brothers Matt (Thomas Sadoski) and Greg (Colin Hanks) show signs of sibling rivalry.
- Tim (Dan Bakkedahl) embarrasses his family, especially son Tyler (Niall Cunningham).
- Sophia (Giselle Eisenberg) masters the art of sarcasm at the wise old age of 6.
- Shark Tank (ABC)
Take a sip of beer or wine when:
- An Entrepreneur cries.
- An entrepreneur overvalues his or her business and gets taken to task for it by the Sharks.
- Wonderful (Kevin O’Leary) refers to an entrepreneur as an insect or animal, like a cockroach or rat, for instance.
Take a shot when:
- Barbara Corcoran wears any neon article of clothing. She’s pretty much the queen of dayglow yellow.
- Lori Greiner mentions QVC or one of her many patents.
- Mark Cuban refers to the Dallas Mavericks.
- Black-ish (ABC)
Take a sip of beer or wine when:
- Dre (Anthony Anderson) seeks family advice from his mostly white co-workers.
- Dre’s mother Ruby praises the Lord, God or Black Jesus.
- Bow’s (Tracee Ellis Ross) light-skinned, hippie heritage is food for fodder – particularly her knack for more “natural”
Take a shot when:
- Diane (Marsai Martin) drops a zinger.
- Miles (Jack Johnson) plays up the adorable-little-boy act to his advantage. Another one if he busts a move.
- Zoey (Yara Shahidi) and Andre Jr. (Marcus Scribner) make their father question their ‘black-ness.’
- The Americans (FX)
Take a sip of beer or wine when:
- There’s a reference to 1980s politics. Two if there’s talk of Ronald Reagan or the Soviet Union.
- Someone is murdered.
- There’s mention of another country outside of the United States. Three if they’re part of the Eastern Bloc.
Take a shot when:
- A bomb detonates.
- A gun pops off.
- Someone is sleeping with the enemy.
- Teachers (TVLand)
Take a sip of beer or wine when:
- The kids talk back.
- The teachers say something wildly inappropriate.
- The kids are at recess.
Take a shot when:
- The teachers make up a mean-spirited game, or a game to benefit their current condition, like being hungover.
- There’s a parent-teacher conference.
- The teachers play “Truth or Dare” in the faculty lounge.
Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and LGBT lifestyle expert whose work has been published in more than 100 outlets across the world. He splits his time between homes in New York City and the Jersey Shore with his dog Jaxon. Connect with Mikey on Twitter @mikeyrox.
