Florida Agenda

By Nicholas Snow

How many friends have I lost to AIDS

?  How many ACT-UP protests have included my voice?  How many safer sex discussions have I participated in?  How many counseling sessions, self-help seminars and 12-step meetings have I attended?  How many times have I, as a columnist, radio personality and television host shared the wisdom garnered from such experiences with those who would read, listen or watch?  And most importantly, how many friends have I lost to AIDS?

The answer to each of these questions is “Countless!,” but clearly not enough to prevent me, in a collision of passion, depression, denial and poor judgment, from contracting HIV in August of 2007.  In many interviews since I have stated, “I became HIV positive decades into the AIDS epidemic, completely armed with the knowledge to protect myself.  It’s still a bit shocking to me.”

Three years after exposure I began taking antiretroviral medications.  My side-effects are vivid dreams and a spike in my cholesterol which may be treated soon with additional medication.  As far as HIV is concerned, I have had no other noticeable health consequences with the exception of the terrible, lasting, flu-like illness that occurred weeks after my exposure, one that left me sitting face to face with an infectious disease specialist in a Bangkok hospital who said, “Your symptoms could be the result of recent acute HIV infection.”  What?!?!

I played dumb.  I did not share that I had recently had unprotected sex.  I left with a scheduled follow-up appointment I never showed up for.  About five months later, on January 3rd, 2008, I confirmed my HIV status at an anonymous testing site, a New Year’s resolution of sorts.  I still could not believe this had happened to me.  In the coming months, I wanted to die, and unlike previous depressions (periodic because of life circumstances, nothing chronic), I actually looked up on the internet painless means of suicide.

I had to ask myself the question most likely going through your head right now.  Why, knowing what I know with the life experience that I have, would I consciously (and while sober, eight years-plus at that point, thank you) participate in unsafe sex?  I have come up with these answers:  1) I was with someone who said and believed he was HIV negative; 2) I was depressed; 3) I did not know (or had conveniently suppressed) how high the incidence of HIV was in the city in which I was residing; and 4) I had a false sense of security because I had remained negative so far into the epidemic.  NONE of these reasons are good reasons, but they are human reasons.

Before I could go public about my status to hopefully prevent others from following in my footsteps, I needed to tell my mom, step-dad, family and close friends.  On October 1st, 2008, I came out to my mother as being HIV positive.  She was very loving in her response.   Here is a journal entry from that day:

“Wow.  I had done it!  The most important part of my journey was over.  I had told my mother, and in telling her, I realized that she is the most important person in my world, the person I love the absolute most, and I am so grateful, and on the verge of tears as I write this, that she is my mother.  She has done the best she could and she didn’t’ do all that bad.”

On March 17th, 2009—the morning after a spectacular conversation with my mom and step-dad on the occasion of their 32nd wedding anniversary—as the result of an error during an outpatient laboratory test, seemingly almost as suddenly as I am telling you, my mother died.

For about two years, from April 2008 to April 2010, I kept a journal that I will be turning into a book, entitled Life Positive—A Journey from the Center of my Heart.  A bit part of this story is the creation of The Power To Be Strong HIV Testing/Safer Sex Song & Music Video Campaign, and I invite you to download MP3 for free at www.SnowbizNow.com.

What can one say?  I endeavor to rise above pride and ego.  HIV empowered me to do this with my mother.  I will cherish her memory forever, and dedicate each day of my life to more healing.­­­­

Follow Nicholas Snow online at  www.Facebook.com/SnowbizNow, www.Twitter.com/SnowbizNow, and at www.SnowbizNow.com. Follow “The Power To Be Strong” HIV Testing / Safer Sex Awareness Campaign at www.Facebook.com/PowerToBeStrong.

By Nicholas Snow

Photo: Nicholas Snow with Manvendra Singh Gohil, February 2009

You may know him from his appearances on Oprah! After a privileged, yet isolated childhood and an arranged yet brief marriage which ended in an annulment, and ultimately finding and being nurtured by other gay men, a genuine prince has become one of the leading LGBT and HIV/AIDS activists in India, where in recent years their efforts resulted in the decriminalization of homosexuality at the national level.

His Royal Highness Prince Manvendra Singh Gohil (“Manav” to his friends, of which I am now one) is the the Yuvraj (Prince) of Rajpipla, 39th in line in the Gohil Dynasty, thriving for 600 years in the Princely State of Gujarat.

Manav was educated in Bombay, now known as Mumbai, and grew up primarily in the family’s colonial 15-bedroom mansion, at times with up to 22 servants – the home was eventually sold by the Prince’s grandfather to the Russian consulate, at which point they downsized to an eight-bedroom estate.

“Around the time of puberty, I came to know that I was different from others – I was attracted towards the same sex … I wasn’t sure what it was called … I certainly knew that I was different from others…,” explained the Prince, who did not know at the time that this was called “gay” or “homosexual.”

Manav was married at the age of 25.  His wife was 22. The marriage lasted for just 15 months and ended in an annulment. He was emotionally attached to his wife but not sexually, hence the marriage was never consummated. The young couple lived in one of the wings of the family’s 35-bedroom, 100-year-old palace, and had the marriage continued, they would have been presented with a palace of their own.

Manav was emotionally fragile, if not distraught, after his marriage ended, “so I didn’t have the courage to go back and live in the palace. Instead, I lived in Bombay for some time, till I got balanced, mentally balanced,” adding that, “In order to obtain mental equilibrium, I joined a short course in Yoga. I actually stayed in a Yoga center for a short period of time, just to fill in the gaps to attain the kind of mental balance in my life…”

A classified advertisement in a local paper led Manav to a community of gay men where he met one of India’s leading gay activists, Ashok Row Kavi. “It turned out that he was my next door neighbor,” the Prince exclaimed of Ashok.  “I couldn’t’ believe that, my god, the guy who I’ve been searching since the time I’ve known about him happens to be my next door neighbor.”

Much later, the Prince started drifting away from the family business and became more involved in gay activism and HIV/AIDS awareness and treatment issues.  After a breakdown, hospitalization and the intervention of a psychologist, Manav ultimately came out in the media, creating a firestorm and resulting in the King and Queen publicly disinheriting him. Ultimately, they reconciled.

“My hopes and dreams are to make India a country which accepts homosexuals, accepts us the way we are, as human beings. It is the mindset of the society which needs to be changed. I’ve just given a push to this movement by openly coming out and talking about our rights. I wish to continue this,” declared the Prince, “and I wish to see a day where gay marriages are allowed in our country.”

Could this be karma?

“Maybe I was assigned to be born in that manner. Maybe I was assigned to be an activist. Otherwise, you can think, I had no doubts of anything in my life. I had all the luxuries of life with me.  What was the necessity of me to start in the first place an organization to work for the gay community? There was no reason for me to do that. Give aside homosexuality – there is not a single royal family in India who has started an organization to work on HIV/AIDS. So, I think of it as maybe I was assigned to be born in this family and to be born here,” concluded the Prince, “and to find support from people like Ashok Row Kavi – who happened to be in my neighborhood!”

SnowBiz Florida Agenda

Follow Nicholas Snow online at  www.Facebook.com/SnowbizNow, www.Twitter.com/SnowbizNow, and at www.SnowbizNow.com. Follow “The Power To Be Strong” HIV Testing/ Safer Sex Awareness Campaign at www.Facebook.com/PowerToBeStrong.

By NICHOLAS SNOW

Both Lisa Thrasher and Stacy Codikow—the duo at the helm of POWER UP (the Professional Organization of Women in Entertainment Reaching Up) concede they were introduced by a friend (Dr. Alicia Burke), but Stacy provided more details.

“We met at a POWER UP pool party,” she explained. “My chiropractor had been trying to set us up for a while. I’m sitting at the pool party and I see this girl walk across the party in what I thought was a three-piece black suit in 100 degree weather. I remember thinking to myself, ‘Who the hell would wear a black three-piece suit to a pool party

? This girl must be dying.’ I just thought she was insane. Lisa spotted me and as always I was wearing pajama bottoms. Lisa thought to herself, ‘Who the hell would wear pajamas to a pool party?’ We said, ‘Hi.’ The next time we met, again at a POWER UP event, we realized we had been running in the same circles for years and had a lot of friends in common. The rest is history.”

According to Lisa, it was love at first sight, but they have no plans to get married, as she explained, “We are both hippies at heart and enjoy the unconventional path,” and added, “My father was a civil rights attorney and Stacy’s father was a holocaust survivor, so individual freedoms and equality are exceptionally important to us both.”

POWER UP, the only 501(c)3 non-profit film production company and educational organization for women and the GLBTQ community. It was conceived in October 2000 with the mission “to promote the visibility and integration of  gay women in entertainment, arts and all forms of media.” Beamed Stacy, “Challenging perception through film” is one of POWER UP’s greatest accomplishments and gifts.”

POWER UP, “develops, finances, produces and distributes award winning films; conducts tremendously successful educational programs through our hands-on filmmaking mentorships, classes, workshops and seminars; provides career, script, television and film counseling; publishes a magazine; awards notable contributors to the arts, entertainment and our community; bolsters our community; and unifies and validates GLBTQ persons all around the world via our films.”

Over the past 10 years, POWER UP, its films, and awardees have garnered much respect and media attention as have POWER UP’s “10 Amazing Gay Women in Showbiz.” These awards were even spoofed on Saturday Night Live by host and POWER UP awardee Ellen DeGeneres. Moreover, the awardees were even congratulated directly by Vermont Governor Howard Dean while he was running for the Presidential nomination for the Democratic Party.

The one thing that has changed about POWER UP in its eleven years history is that, in 2009, they officially brought men into the fold at every level of the organization.

As for Stacy and Lisa, they’re very busy beyond the organization as well.  Lisa produced Cherien Dabis’ “Memoirs of an Evil Stepmother” teaches, and is producing a film about South Africa, while Stacy is writing a book, a script, runs another business, and also teaches.

I was surprised to learn during the interview that the couple now calls Palm Springs home in addition to L.A. Lisa shared, “We love the pride and graciousness of Palm Springs and its GLBTQ community. We decided to set Palm Springs as the location of our next film and look forward to integrating POWER UP into this wonderful oasis.”

“Die, Angelo, Die,” a black comedy thriller, Stacy explained, “was written to be shot in Palm Springs, and we have been scouting locations and landmark sites to use in the film. We want to tap into the local community to be a part of this project as well, from extras to crew and, of course, donors and supporters are always encouraged.”

Among their accomplishments, Stacy explained, “I am so proud of our mentorship program, which is the only program out there that teaches on the set of a professional movie. It’s 50% boot camp, 50% university and 100% awesome. The POWER UP Filmmaking Mentorship Program is not for the faint of heart. I overheard on the set probably the best expressed sentiments of the mentees, explaining, ‘There’s no other place where one can get this much access and education.  It’s like film school meets the Universal Studios tour with a trip to Fantasy Island thrown in!’”

For more information about everything POWER UP, visit www.powerupfilms.org.

SnowBiz Florida Agenda

Follow Nicholas Snow online at  www.Facebook.com/SnowbizNow, www.Twitter.com/SnowbizNow, and at www.SnowbizNow.com. Follow “The Power To Be Strong” HIV Testing/ Safer Sex Awareness Campaign at www.Facebook.com/PowerToBeStrong.