Florida Agenda

By ROBERT ELIAS DEATON

Last week, we introduced you to that picturesque tip of Cape Cod known as Provincetown, a speck of history and tolerance celebrated as much for its Portugese bakeries as it is for its large permanent lesbian and gay populations. This town of 3,500 soars in the warmer months to 10,000 people, including tourists, transvestites, and Tea Party candidates searching for the last holdouts of liberal indifference.

If you arrive by ferryboat from Boston, have your camera ready. There’s an instant photo opportunity waiting night or day at MacMillan Wharf—home to the town’s fishing fleet, ferries, yachts, and assorted pelicans hoping for easy fast food. Most likely your bed and breakfast is a short walk from the pier, or the local taxi services (we recommend Black & White Cab—508-487-7800) will take you to any destination from the pier for $8.00 per person, including two bags of luggage. For your first dining-by-the-bay experience, book at Fanizzi’s by the Sea (539 Commercial St., 508-487-1964). Situated on the east end of Provincetown, the restaurant is so close to the water that high tide literally flows under the stilted frame of the building. Our favorite from the menu has always been the Baked Cod Stuffed with Crab Meat and served with a Newburg Sauce ($24.99), but the choices range from a simple burger ($9.99) on up.

Right in the center of town, look for the Portuguese Bakery (299 Commercial St., 508-487-1803), where the specialty is Malacadas—Portuguese Sugar Doughnuts that are rather addicting. While it’s true the bakery is a tourist trap, it’s equally as accurate to announce that they have the best stuffed sandwiches in town. We like them so much, that we’ve often waited in the no-itnever- gets-any-shorter line for a to-go lunch.

Herring Cove Beach is one mile from town at the end of Route 6. Follow the signs as you merge on to Province Lands Road, where you’ll discover two parking lots servicing the white sand. Since this beach is officially managed by Cape Cod National Seashore, there is a $10 parking fee. When you reach the water, turn to the left and discover the best gay beach in P-town. Continue a little beyond that point, and you’ll find sunbathers shedding their clothes to remove any trace of the Great Northeast tan line.

The Provincetown Public Library (356 Commercial St.) is a fun place to people watch, and check your email via the free public use computers. The ½ scale model of the schooner Rose Dorothea pays tribute to the town’s fisherman legacy, and is the showcase of the second-floor children’s section.

Mussel Beach Health Club (35 Bradford St., 508-487- 0001) is the cleanest, most u p – t o – d a t e facility for working your muscles to a fine tune. Free weights combine with elliptical crosstrainers and stairmasters in this popular gym that sells a week-pass for $90.

The A-House (6 Masonic Pl.) is the bar where twinks, bears, leather men, and muscle boys share the space. Actually three bars in one, the place includes the Little Bar with its cruisy men and a jukebox for sound, the upstairs Macho Bar where naughty is nice, and the large dance floor and patio called the Big Room—all open ‘til 1 a.m. There is no end of fun in this town of plenty, where a simple walk down Commercial Street is a kaleidoscope of gays, straights, lesbians, and the occasional fisherman—all living the dream on Cape Cod Bay.

Read Part 1 : TRAVEL: PROVINCETOWN- If the Pilgrims Could See Us Now

By ROBERT ELIAS DEATON

In 1620, the Mayflower, carrying 100 separatists from England and Holland, landed on the tip of Cape Cod and anchored just off the shore of what is now Provincetown. It was a brutal November day, as Novembers can be in P-Town. Within the week, the Pilgrims decided that the place was a little too rough and exposed for their needs, and they continued on to Plymouth Rock, directly across Cape Cod Bay on the mainland. Before they left the tiny tip of Cape Cod, however, they signed the Mayflower Compact, which established the laws that governed this group of religious extremists who formed the backbone of America’s original colonies.

The village of Provincetown was eventually taken over by Portuguese fisherman, who found the harbor a perfect launch point for their daily fishing runs. And so it remained until the mid-30s, when artists and writers discovered this remote spot, and began its rise into one of the gayest spots in America. You arrive in Provincetown through Boston International Airport, connecting to P-Town on Cape Air (866-CAPE-AIR), or via high-speed ferries (carrying people, pets and bicycles, but no cars). Book a seat on Bay State Cruises (877-PTFERRY), or the slightly slower and cheaper Boston Harbor Cruises (877-SEE-WHALE) with transportation provided at the airport in Boston to either ferry via water taxi.

From P-Town airport, taxis or shuttles make the quick five-minute haul into the center of the village, where you will find a choice of luxurious guest houses, family motels, or the famous Gifford House Inn (9 Carver St., 800-434-0130)—the original hotel which was the final stop of the stagecoach in 1858, and is still in business today. Run by Jim Fosse, The Gifford House provides straightforward rooms on three floors reached via the original stairs. While all the rooms have private baths, ask about A/C—some rooms have it, some do not-though that poses no problem, since the hotel was positioned on a crest overlooking the harbor, and receives cooling bay breezes year-round.

Rates start under $100 a night. The CastAways restaurant is open for breakfast and lunch, with the Lobby Piano Bar open nightly at 10 p.m. The Purgatory Leather Dance Bar is in the cellar and appropriately dark and nasty, particularly on Sunday nights when there’s always a line for admission. For the ultimate in luxury and she-sheindulgence, just across the street is the Crowne Pointe Historic Inn & Spa (82 Bradford St., 877-276-9631) where the innkeepers provide working fireplaces, p i l l o w – t o p p e d beds, homecooked breakfasts, and a heated pool complete with towel boys and drink service.

The Bistro at Crowne Point is a highly- recommended gourmet restaurant, where the views are nearly as splendid as the cuisine. Dress up and act the part. For longer stays, contact the legendary girls at Pied Piper Real Estate (199 Commercial St., # 8, 508-487-1528). Our favorites Betty Newman and Phoebe Otis are privy to all the choice rentals for a week, month, or throughout the whole season. Personalized treatment is the hallmark here, and you will end up recommending these gals to your friends.

They will be the first to tell you that a bike is the most you’ll ever need to get around, while much of the town’s action can be reached on foot, walking down the packed main throughfare, Commercial Street. Next week, we’ll fill you in on all the restaurants, clothing stores, clubs, galleries, cruise spots, and gyms—plus the oh-so-special public library, which is a must-visit on anyone’s vacation schedule. Like many things Provincetown, it’s old, it’s colorful, and oh-so-gay.

Provincetown, Cape Cod – Part 2

By ROBERT ELIAS DEATON

There is one thing you can’t miss when you visit Denver. The great outdoors beckons not only you, but every other person in the town. Runners abound; bikers cruise by; hikers have their backpacks ready to climb; and all invited by air as crisp as the first bite of an apple. Denver is the capital of Colorado and a quick way to orientate yourself in the city is to go to Colorado State Capitol Building (200 E Colfax Ave.; 303-866-2604).

Climb to the Rotunda and glimpse a view of the 200 mountains visible from the dome. You’ll also get a visual on the layout of the city, which will help you when you take to the streets— and, yes, some alleys. Biking around town is made easy with the 850 miles of paved off-road trails.

The city has a great system of B-Cycles that allows you to rent a bike in one location and leave it on the street at any of the more than 50 drop stations. For more information on B-Cycles in Denver visit denver.org/what-to-do/ sports-recreation/denver-b-cycle-rides. While we’re the first to admit that the concept of bus tour leaves us cold and shivering, don’t let that stop you from booking aboard Banjo Billy’s Bus Tours.

The “bus” is more like a rolling hillbilly shack with couches, recliners and horse saddles to make anyone feel at home. The tales heard aboard Banjo Billy’s run the gamut from ghosts to prostitutes to gangsters long in heaven, so prepare yourself (banjobilly.com).

Despite its conservative reputation, Denver knows how to throw a party. We always start a fun night at Charlie’s Denver for its mix of gay and straight clientele (okay, mostly gay and mostly men, but hey, it’s a country-western party). There’s line dancing, karaoke, trivia contests, and pool parties— without a pool (gotta love it).

Charlie’s Denver is located in Capitol Hill (900 East Colfax Ave.). Boyztown Denver will be remembered by the old-timers as The Brig. It’s now a sexy, gay strip club with a cabaret element and more than a touch of the old-school about it. Translation: young twinks, old admirers, and lots of numbers and dollar bills going back and forth (117 Broadway). For the leather crowd, and those that like them, the Denver Eagle brings that tradition to life in an authentic, rough, and stud sort of way.

You’ll get more attention if you wear a harness or something that says you know your way around a set of wrist and ankle cuffs. The Eagle appreciates the nuance (1475 36th St.). For great music and let’s-break-a-sweat dancing, head directly to Compound (145 Broadway at W 2nd Ave). It used to be called Compound Basix, and then tried Compound Denver. Now, either a part of the sign fell off, or it’s just plan Compound.

Any way you call it, it’s a super friendly place with sexy, sexy bartenders. When it’s time to do something other than drink, think Racines (650 Sherman St.). It’s a classy joint that’s been round for decades, is gay owned, and is open until midnight most nights (which in Colorado time is akin to four a.m.) Love the omelets at Racines, washed down with the strongest margarita in town.

There’s a local outlet of Hamburger Mary’s Bar & Grill here as well. Located at 700 E 17th Ave., Mary’s has the best patio dining in town for lunch or dinner. While it serves the usual suspects in the form of burgers and wraps, the food is as fresh as the camp a la Denver.

By ROBERT ELIAS DEATON

Mention Denver, and everyone always has some story to tell. Like the time the city bid for the 1976 Winter Games, and then turned down the Games after winning the honor once they found out how much it would cost! (Innsbruck, Austria ended up hosting the Games.) Or how about the one that showcases Denver as “the pride of the Rockies,” even though the mountain chain ends just west of the city, which is actually located on the grassy plains. And then, of course, there was that ugly period in the 90s when Colorado passed Amendment 2, which allowed for discrimination in employment, housing, and public accommodation on the basis of sexual orientation. Lesbians and gays got worked into a lather, along with quite a few straights, and got Amendment 2 overturned in the U.S. Supreme Court, but not before tourism went down the toilet and the state was judged the black hole of bigotry and injustice.

Well, we’re happy to report, things are quite a bit better today in Denver as well as other parts of Colorado, though Colorado Springs and its neighbors were hit by raging forest fires last month that are still not completely extinguished. Other than some blow-by smoke, Denver, Queen City of the West, was undamaged.

Your visit to Denver begins by landing in one the world’s most elegant and picturesque airports, Denver International. Because it has been built to handle future business, it always feels half full, which is a good thing, and allows you plenty of time to check the art and concourse restaurants and businesses.

When clearing security at Denver International always try to go through Terminal A. It’s the least crowded and all terminals are connected by a tram that zips you around the entire place in a few minutes.

Our favorite hotel in the city isn’t the largest, but simply the best. It’s the Brown Palace Hotel and Spa (321 17th Street), and, built in 1908, has one of this country’s first atrium designs. While the rooms are as-you’d-expect spectacular, it is the spa at the Brown that keeps us coming back.

The architecture of Denver International was designed to mimic the Rocky Mountains

We particularly like the Gentlemen’s Body Treatment Imagine, if you will, 50 minutes of Deep Tissue Massage followed by a half-hour full body sugar exfoliation. (It may cost $155, but when you’re finished, you’ll feel 20 years younger and want to move in.) The hotel is in the downtown area, near everything, including a gay bar–Denver Wrangler (1700 Logan Street), a cross between a cow palace, a bear barn, and a rodeo roundup. The slogan here is “Where Real Men Come to Drink.”

Just southeast of downtown is Cheesman Park where the annual gay pride parade begins. No surprise there, since it’s the “gayest” park in Denver and the neighborhood surrounding it is fabulous.

What will come as a shock to even locals is that the whole place used to be a cemetery whose location soon made the land more valuable than for what the plots could be sold. That’s what we love about Denver, a few snaps of the fingers and hundred dollar bills, and bodies were being transplanted and posies planted in their place.

While Cherry Creek is the most elegant neighborhood, the most fun section is definitely Stapleton. Located just east of downtown, where Stapleton Airport used to be, it’s been totally redeveloped by the gays, who renamed the place Gaypleton in their honor. That’s what happens when you take over the place.

Cheesman Park (the “gayest park in Denver”), the starting point of Denver’s gay pride parade

Next week, we’ll cover outdoor activities in the region, and the favorite secret spot in the whole city. Yes, you’ll have to wait.

By ROBERT ELIAS DEATON

All good things must come to an end, and so it is with our final installment of travel within the Hawaiian Islands. No island adventure on Hawaiian soil is complete without experiencing at least one Luau. And the one we remember most fondly is the Royal Kona Resort’s Lava Legends & Legacies – Journeys of the South Pacific Luau (75-5852 Alii Drive Kailua-Kona, HI 96740, 808-329-3111). It is a feast of tropical delicacies, song, and dance celebrating the legends and lore of Polynesia. More than that, it is an incredible sunset experience at one of the most perfect spots on all of Kailua Bay. The featured dish, of course, is the roasted whole Kalua pig, cooked in an underground imu oven.

Accompanying entrees include island fish with black bean sauce, island chicken, Lomi Lomi Salmon, and Pulehu (teriyaki) beef. The torch lighting begins on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday at 6:15 p.m. with an open bar from 5-7 p.m. Fire dancers, hula dancers, and ukulele musicians make for a perfect blend of culture, entertainment and great all-you-can-eat dining. (Well worth the price at $65.00.)

Our local guru of all things Big Island, Uncle Don Sanders, called in to say that his own personal favorite gay-owned private tour is Kapohokine Adventures (808-964-1000), on the Hilo side of the island. Kapohokine offers a variety of zip-line experiences, volcano lava tours, hiking, waterfalls, complete with a chicken barbecue on a macadamia nut farm. Some tours last as long as 12 hours, so some advanced planning is needed for this one. Uncle Don says “Personal, private, super fantastic, fascinating guides, and places you’ll never forget.” Lest you missed it—fascinating guides.

For those whose idea of fun includes a snorkel dive, remember Dolphin Discoveries (808-322- 8000). Word from the scene is that this is a mom and pop operation that will yacht you to their secret dive destinations by Zodiac boats. The tour includes snorkel gear in case you’re traveling light, with sea caves, coral reefs and pods of wonderfully charismatic dolphins.

If you have a free Wednesday evening, we highly recommend an Evening at Kahua Ranch (808-882-7954). This tour is headquartered on an historic 8,500 acre working cattle ranch located 3,200 feet above sea level in the Kohala Mountains. The ranch provides transportation for area hotels, with buffet, beer, wine, singing, line dancing and cute paniolos (Hawaiian cowboys) Closer to Kona town, Big Island Grill (75-5702 Kuakini Hwy, Kailua-Kona, HI 96740, 808-326- 1153) is a local secret that serves up huge portions at reasonable prices. With all the décor of a Hawaiian diner, this place puts the emphasis of delicious. Try the Saimin for a brothy noodle soup that doesn’t overload you with salt. For larger-thanlife appetites, there’s a always the loco moco— three kinds of meat served on a platter the size of Dodge Pickup. For more traditional fare, you can’t go wrong with kalua pig and cabbage.

For a short two-hour side trip across ancient lava flows, head north along Highway 19 north, stopping at Hapuna Beach for a swim. Continue past the Mauna Kea Beach Resort another two miles and branch off on Highway 270 into Kawaihae town (don’t blink). Stop for a bit at Café Pesto (61-36653 Hawaii 270) for our favorite Crispy Coconut Crusted Calamari served on a slaw of arugula, won bok and pickled ginger (14.95). And while you’re there, say hi to chef “Moki” Tavares.

Continue north, and you’ll discover the hidden secret of Mahukona, with its old sugar cane port, broken down pier and perfect beach-side snorkeling. A hui hou

Also Read the Previous 3 Hawaii Travel Articles at the links below:

The Big Island Hawaii’s Largest Treasure Part III

MAUI The Valley Isle. Hawaii Series Part II

HAWAII – Pick an Island, They’re All Paradise

By ROBERT ELIAS DEATON

Nothing on earth quite matches the stunning spectacle of an erupting volcano. All power, heat, and lava- -unleashed in a formidable display of Mother Nature so incredible that even witnessing the act fails to convince the viewer that there is an authority so almighty that it is capable of producing such a show.

Yet here, on the Big Island of Hawaii, it is a daily performance, hurled skyward by Pele, goddess of fire, lightning, and wind, who makes her home in the caldera of the 4,190-foot Kilauea volcano. In a constant state of active eruption since 1983, this Hawaiian hot spot is the most active volcano in the world. Lava leaving the volcano is so hot (calculated to be over 2,000 degrees F) that the Hawaii Volcano National Park has closed previously open access to the active lava flow area.

Currently, the best way to view this unbelievable spectacle of nature is via plane. Big Island Air (808-329-4868) provides an hour-and-a-half tour that leaves from Kona International Airport , five times a day including the incredible sunset tour, when the lava of Kilauea flames brilliance even against the incredible Hawaiian sunset.

While many gravitate to helicopters and Paradise Helicopters (808-969-7392) provides an excellent service, Big Island Air is less expensive, provides first class all-window seats, and a longer tour, so the choice is yours, but do not miss the opportunity to see this wonder of nature.

The Big Island may not be as sophisticated as Maui with its grand homes and lavish golf courses, or as gay intense as Oahu with its clubs, bars and bath houses, but Hawaii’s largest island has its own special charm of undeveloped rain forests, hiking trails, waterfalls, and some of the loveliest beaches in the world.

Hotels on the island range from the ultra-extravagant Four Seasons Resort Hual?lai at Historic Ka‘?p?lehu ( fourseasons.com/hualalai) and Fairmont Orchid on the Kohala Coast ( fairmont.com/orchid) to the budget based Marriott Courtyard King Kamehameha (marriott.com/ hotels/travel/koacy-courtyard-kingkamehamehas- kona-beach-hotel ) on the beach at Kona.

There’s also a variety of bed-and-breakfast accommodations throughout the island, many in off-thegrid exotic locales. Since there is no such thing as avoiding the sun in this cow-paddy of paradise in the Pacific, you might as well head to the most delicious of beaches on the Big Island.

Local sun worshipper and palm expert Donald Sanders (Uncle Don, to you) assures us that Magic Sands Beach Park , a smidge past the Four Mile Marker on Alii Drive in Kona on the West side of the island is a prime spot close to many of the major hotels.

Personally, we’ve always had a fondness for Kua Bay, officially known as Manini’owali Beach Park since they’ve pave the entrance road (directly across the Veteran’s Cemetery at Mile Marker 19) and added paved free parking. The pale blue water luxuriates against the white sand, with lots of muscled boogie boarders to keep you amused and spellbound.

For the more ecological among us, we can’t rave enough about Big Island Eco Adventures (808-889-5111). They operate nine zip lines across the jungle treetops and waterfalls. The cost is currently $176.04, and worth every single penny.

It’s so much fun, you may double dip and go back for more, or try Hawaii Forest and Trail (808-331-8505) with their own zip lines and hiking tours, including an evening volcano summit tour. Next week, we’ll get more tips from Donald Sanders, the ultimate in Big Island savvy, who will talk food and trips to the wet East side.

Check on Donald’s latest book: “ Farrah Fawcett—A Photo Essay ” (mixbook.com/photo-books/ stories/farrah-fawcett-a-photo-essaycopy- 7453041 ). Priceless.

By ROBERT ELIAS DEATON

Swaying palm trees, the sound of distant waves lapping upon pristine white or red or black sand beaches, tropical sunsets silhouetting hula dancers in flowing grass skirts. Yes, this is paradise, otherwise known as Hawaii. Of all the seven populated Hawaiian Islands, Maui has always been our favorite. Despite its lack of any gay clubs (at one time there were three including a local franchise of Hamburger Mary’s), there are several gay beaches—one white powder and the other red sand), plus rain forests, volcanic calderas, picturesque waterfalls, an historic whaling village, and some of the most beautiful vistas anywhere. And it’s not just our opinion.

Even the Hawaiians have a saying: Maui no ka oi—Maui is the best.

Any visit to this island of valleys and flowers begins at the Kahului Airport where the minute you deplane, you will know that you’re in a very special place. The air around you is filled with the fragrance of this tropical paradise. The smiles you receive will be genuine, and the absence of worries and time immediately obvious. Set your watch to Maui time, which is six hours behind Eastern Standard Time in the real world. But that is unfair to even say that since once you step on the soil of this special place, the only thing you’ll experience is eternal nirvana.

Most tourists head immediately to one of two places. Wailea on the South shore or Lahaina on the West. The South has its champions for its beautiful golf courses, shopping and luxury hotels including the Grand Wailea Resort (3850 Wailea Alanui Drive), where you’ll find the grandest gardens in all of the Hawaiian Islands, spread over 40 acres of lush. Prices for rooms and suites are grand as well ranging from $489- $1,300 a night. And worth every penny. If that is too rich for your blood, go and visit the place at the very least and pretend you’re a guest. It’s that special.

Nest door, in the beach village of Makena, is the area’s closest gay stretch of sand known as Little Beach. It’s a mile past the Maui Prince Hotel (5400 Makena Alanui), at Makena State Park. Public parking is free, and so is the beauty.

Head toward the ocean and hang a right, follow people climbing over a small lava hill and prepare for nude sunbathing, hanky-panky in the brambles, and water so clear that you can see the fish joining you for a swim.

On the West side of the island, our favorite hotel is the Westin Maui Resort and Spa (2365 Kaanapali Pkwy). Priced from $359 a night, it’s directly on the ocean with great gym facilities and close to the whaling village of Lahaina, where you’ll find one of Maui’s best restaurants:

David Paul’s Island Grill (900 Front Street). For the more adventurous, you can drive completely around the West Maui Mountains (an extinct volcano), past the Ritz Carlton hotel and the oldest one-room churches on the island.

Continue heading north and you’ll discover Ho‘okipa Beach Park (Hana Highway & Hookipa Park) just past the surfing village of Paia. Windsurfing and kite surfing is world-class here, so look but don’t touch unless you’re extremely experienced.

Continue to travel East for another 52 miles and you’ll arrive in Hana, 59 bridges and 620 curves later. This tiny village has long been considered the last Hawaiian frontier. Its colorful Hasegawa’s General Store (5165 Hana Hwy) and its five-star Travaasa Hana Hotel (5031 Hana Hwy) are adjacent to Hana’s Red Sand Beach—a little climbing is required to reach this slice of heaven. Hana is also the home of the gorgeous Blue Pool and Waterfall, O’heo Gulch Pools, plus the Grave of Charles Lindbergh in nearby Kipahulu. Pa`a ka waha.

Robert Elias Deaton is a world-traveling epicure who enjoys the finer things in life.

READ PART 1 HERE: HAWAII – Pick an Island, They’re All Paradise

By ROBERT ELIAS DEATON

Swaying palm trees, the sound of distant waves lapping upon pristine white or red or black sand beaches, tropical sunsets silhouetting hula dancers in flowing grass skirts. Yes, this is paradise, otherwise known as Hawaii.

Often referred to as the ultimate in vacation destinations, Hawaii is more diverse than any state in the union—and the only state comprised entirely of islands numbering in the hundreds. Of these, seven are inhabited, and each has a charm unique to its position in the island chain.

The most populated and gay famous is Oahu (The Gathering Place), the home of Waikiki beach, Honolulu, high-rise condos, and the only royal palace on U.S. soil.  ’Iolani Palace, built in 1879 for King Kal?kaua, isn’t grand by international palace standards. It is, however, unique as the only example of Hawaiian Renaissance architecture. Located at 364 S King Street, the palace is in downtown Honolulu and is open to the public.

The Royal Hawaiian Hotel (2346 Kalakaua Ave) has a long history of celebrity guests, its pink façade welcoming heads-of-state, financiers, and movie stars. But despite repeated restorations, the hotel is no longer the Queen of Waikiki Beach, though a visit to the lobby is always a pleasant journey back in time. For the height of luxury accommodations, there is none finer than the Halekulani Hotel (2199 Kalia Road) which has been ranked among the top five-star hotels in the world since its opening in 1997. With Hawaii’s acceptance of civil unions in January of this year, the hotel has become the favored spot for beach-front ceremonies and receptions.

The gay beach in Hawaii is a few blocks away from Halekulani (toward Diamond Head volcano) on Queen’s Surf Beach near Kapiolani Park. Before you get too excited, the name derives from Hawaii’s last royal, Queen Liliuokalani. Her beach house and pier were once positioned at the exact spot where current day lesbians and homosexuals paddle board and sun. On weekends, the adjacent park area becomes Sunset on the Beach, with movies shown under the stars. Too much fun.

Right around the corner, you’ll also find Hula’s Bar and Lei Stand Waikiki (134 Kapahulu Ave), the Hawaiian version of Stonewall. It’s been a fixture on the Honolulu gay scene since Adam and Eve did their thing, or perhaps longer some say.

Our dear friend Jack Law (otherwise known as Da Kine or Big Daddy) is the owner of the joint, which is located on the second floor of the Waikiki Grand Hotel (a good inexpensive choice if you want to say close to the action). At dusk, the bar’s sliding glass windows glide open and transform this gem into a visual postcard of people watching, sunsets and passing catamarans. The drinks are strong, the music is upbeat, and the clientele a mixture of cute, rugged, muscled locals with a few paunchy tourists advertising themselves by their sunburn.

If you’re in a hiking mood, from Hula’s follow Kalakaua Ave. along the beach toward Diamond Head until it turns into Diamond Head Road.  Four blocks ahead watch for the turn-off on your right to Beach Road. This takes you to Diamond Head Lighthouse, which was completed in 1917 and was listed on the National Register of Historic Places in 1980. It’s a great spot of soak up the sun. You might even meet some new friends, since this is a hot gay rendezvous point.

An extra bonus: on the way home, you’ll pass right by Hula’s again. It’s the perfect time to visit Jack, and tell him Guy Magazine says Howzit?

By ROBERT ELIAS DEATON

We’re a sucker for Brazilian butts. And nowhere on earth are there more on display then in the incredible city of São Paulo. It’s not only the largest city in Brazil; it’s the largest city in all of South America, and the seventh-largest city by population in the world.

It’s just another example of the fact that size matters. At last count, the population of São Paulo was just over 11 million—three million more than NYC.

Ah, and the people. Attractive, friendly, open, and happy. And, lest we forget the most charming part, they speak Portuguese—but with an Italian accent, in case you’re relying on your Rosetta Stone. They’ll be rattling it off at such a machine-gun pace that there is no point in trying to keep up your end of the conversation. It’s all part of the adventure in this city named after Saint Paul—as in the Apostle, not Minnesota.

Getting to São Paulo can be a bit of a headtrip since it’s an eight-hour flight from Miami (or ten hours from New York) non-stop as the crows fly via the national airline TAM Linhas Aereas. Translation: two full-length movies, a fourcourse dinner and a three-hour nap. It gives new meaning to the phrase: somos nós lá ainda? (Are we there yet? for the Baptists among us.)

Upon landing at the São Paulo/Guarulhos– Governador André Franco Montoro International Airport, take a deep breath and plunge head first into the excitement. You get to the city via taxi (there is a bus, but you’re gay, remember?). This will set you back exactly 85 Brazilian reals, or $42 in real money. Buy a prepaid taxi voucher in advance, since the traffic will be monstrous. Though it’s only 19 miles to São Paulo, it could take as long as an hour to get there. You don’t want to be in the back seat when that meter is ticking.

Our favorite hotel in São Paulo is the Mercure São Paulo Alamedes Hotel. It’s not the most luxurious hotel in the city, but it is one of the most convenient and reasonably priced at $139 per night. It has everything you could possibly need—room service, a good gym, rooftop pool with a view, a fantastic cute staff, and wi-fi service.

It is centrally located in the most fashionable part of town, called the Jardins district, which not only has the most exclusive shopping street in the country—it’s called Oscar Freire (think Rodeo Drive), it has the majority of the gay clubs as well as the São Paulo Museum of Art.XXX On the club scene, spending Sunday at Dorothy Parker (Alameda Lorena, 2119 – Jardins) is must do. During the rest of the week, it’s a very very private club with a guest list. And no, you’re not on it. On Sunday, however, they open the doors to extremely cute gay guys who like dancing flesh to flesh beginning at 11 p.m. and hanging out until 2 a.m. or so.

Not far away is the Ritz (Alameda Franca, 1088 – Jardins), a fun burger and pizza joint where you can people watch all night, and linger over a cappuccino. Afterward on Fridays and Saturdays, head across town to Flex Club (Ave. Marquês de São Vicente 1767 – Barra Funda)—an enormous hanger-like structure that holds 2,000+.

While that may sound like a large number, wrap your head around 4 million! That’s the number of gays expected to attend the Parada do Orgulho Gay GLBT de São Paulo on June 10. Translation: Gay Pride, São Paulo style. Prepare to sweat—and grin ear-to-ear.

Robert Elias Deaton is a world-traveling epicure who enjoys the finer things in life.

By ROBERT ELIAS DEATON

We’re a sucker for Brazilian butts. And nowhere on earth are there more on display then in the incredible city of São Paulo . It’s not only the largest city in Brazil; it’s the largest city in all of South America, and the seventh-largest city by population in the world. It’s just another example of the fact that size matters.

At last count, the population of São Paulo was just over 11 million—three million more than NYC. Ah, and the people. Attractive, friendly, open, and happy. And, lest we forget the most charming part, they speak Portuguese—but with an Italian accent, in case you’re relying on your Rosetta Stone.

They’ll be rattling it off at such a machine-gun pace that there is no point in trying to keep up your end of the conversation. It’s all part of the adventure in this city named after Saint Paul—as in the Apostle, not Minnesota. Getting to São Paulo can be a bit of a headtrip since it’s an eight-hour flight from Miami (or ten hours from New York) non-stop as the crows fly via the national airline TAM Linhas Aereas.

Translation: two full-length movies, a four course dinner and a three-hour nap. It gives new meaning to the phrase: somos nós lá ainda? (Are we there yet? for the Baptists among us.) Upon landing at the São Paulo/Guarulhos– Governador André Franco Montoro International Airport, take a deep breath and plunge head first into the excitement.

You get to the city via taxi (there is a bus, but you’re gay, remember?). This will set you back exactly 85 Brazilian reals, or $42 in real money. Buy a pre paid taxi voucher in advance, since the traffic will be monstrous. Though it’s only 19 miles to São Paulo, it could take as long as an hour to get there.

You don’t want to be in the back seat when that meter is ticking. Our favorite hotel in São Paulo is the Mercure São Paulo Alamedes Hotel . It’s not the most luxurious hotel in the city, but it is one of the most convenient and reasonably priced at $139 per night. It has everything you could possibly need—room service, a good gym, rooftop pool with a view, a fantastic cute staff, and wi-fi service.

It is centrally located in the most fashionable part of town, called the Jardins district, which not only has the most exclusive shopping street in the country—it’s called Oscar Freire (think Rodeo Drive), it has the majority of the gay clubs as well as the São Paulo Museum of Art. On the club scene, spending Sunday at Dorothy Parker (Alameda Lorena, 2119 – Jardins) is must do. During the rest of the week, it’s a very very private club with a guest list.

And no, you’re not on it. On Sunday, however, they open the doors to extremely cute gay guys who like dancing flesh to flesh beginning at 11 p.m. and hanging out until 2 a.m. or so. Not far away is the Ritz (Alameda Franca, 1088 – Jardins), a fun burger and pizza joint where you can people watch all night, and linger over a cappuccino.

Afterward on Fridays and Saturdays, head across town to Flex Club (Ave. Marquês de São Vicente 1767 – Barra Funda)—an enormous hanger-like structure that holds 2,000+. While that may sound like a large number, wrap your head around 4 million!

That’s the number of gays expected to attend the Parada do Orgulho Gay GLBT de São Paulo on June 10. Translation: Gay Pride, São Paulo style. Prepare to sweat—and grin ear-to-ear.