Florida Agenda

Dear Editor:

RE: Court Rules Both Mothers Have Parental Rights

Regarding your story on the Daytona Beach court ruling about parental rights for gay parents (Agenda, Jan. 5, 2012: “Court Rules Both Mothers Have Parental Rights”), it saddens me that having gone through the all the rigmarole of meeting, partnering, conceiving, and raising a child together, at least for a time, these two women engaged in the age-old rite of throwing the bathwater out and hoping the baby sticks to the side of the tub.

The challenges that face LGBT parents are great, and parents of all sexual identities deserve the sympathy and good will of everyone, especially when things sour and partners go their separate ways. I am sickened, though, that these women seem to have thrown good sense and judgment, not to mention compassion and concern for the child, to the wind in what – an ego-driven custody battle worthy of any moron—gay, straight, or what-have-you—ever to disgrace the stage of Jerry Springer’s program. These women were pioneers, and more importantly, parents. They owe it to the child firstly and the greater LGBT community at-large secondly to be good examples, even when it comes to ending their loving relationship. Grow up, ladies.

- Lee, Dania Beach

Dear Editor:

Naugle Endorses Santorum – OMG!

I can only ask myself and the public at large a full list of questions; such as doesn’t Santorum already have plenty of crippling, degrading baggage without Naugle’s endorsement? Also, what kind of crazy person accepts an endorsement from the mayor of a large metropolitan city that left office discredited by his own preposterous statements and wasteful proposals? He was expelled by the city of FT. Lauderdale Tourist Council for his derogatory / inflammatory statements which insulted the large gay South Florida community, no? Even though I know the answer would be… a Republican… guilty of delusion.

Oh for sure – Republicans love scandalous behavior. Do we ever get an honest, straight answer from any of the wife cheaters and divorcees defending the sanctity of marriage while condemning gay marriage?

Naugle has plenty of his own baggage – we already know that every library (in the world) contains pornographic images, but only in the minds of the illiterate.

Naugle continues to show his ignorance and buffoonery by stating his reasons for the Santorum endorsement… the anti-abortion issue and the Constitution’s Second Amendment.

Like it is with too many of the similarly disengaged, the right to own as many weapons as one chooses is solid but the Constitutional right of privacy to do with one’s body as she (or he) chooses is far too indistinct for the right to decide upon.

They oppose family planning yet are willing to let the world succumb to its biggest risk, over-population!

We can all bet that neither of them is familiar enough with the document to quote its most valuable statement, “[…] ensure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defense, and promote the general Welfare…”

Where else does the selfishness and dislike for “Obama-care” come from? Isn’t it greed? Don’t Santorum, Naugle, their
families and many others receive the benefit of taxpayer funded healthcare?

So how do we rid our fine city of this “frothy” pair? Shout it out and then flush it!
- David Littlefield, Fort Lauderdale

Dear Editor:
Regarding your report covering Broward County’s hate crimes numbers for the last reported year (“Broward County Sheriff on Hate Crimes: ‘We Don’t Want to Be Number One’”), during the Matthew Shepard trial, Chastity Pasley and Kristen Price (the respective girlfriends of killers Aaron McKinney and Russell Henderson at the time of the event) testified that Henderson and McKinney both plotted beforehand to rob a gay man. That’s what sealed the fates of those murderers even before any hate crime legislation had been enacted. Hate crimes legislation is intended to bring awareness to people and declare that the United States does not tolerate socially-targeted hateful acts. It proves the point that some crimes are perpetrated out of hatred for any given
social class and that we, as a society of civilized people find these crimes to be particularly offensive.

Unfortunately, some people don’t completely get it. They believe that the point of hate crimes legislation and reporting is to issue that “extra punishment” for the perpetrators. Obviously, prosecuting attorneys have come to see the classification as a tricky bonus round in the game we call justice. The Broward Sheriff’s Office seems to ascribe to that latter definition. I’m sure this belief is popular in Tallahassee as well. It would be quite convenient for Florida’s Republican legislature and the taser-happy cops of North Florida to think of hate crimes reporting as something that’s sort of pointless and excessive. I don’t mean to imply that BSO doesn’t take hate crimes seriously and is concerned. But at the same time, there is evidence that BSO still might need some improvement in this department when compared to their peers. In a report issued by the Florida Attorney General’s office in 2008, only 4 hate crimes were officially reported by the Broward Sheriff’s Office. However, 25 hate crimes were reported by city police within Broward County. These numbers may be getting better—maybe—but there is still room for improvement.

- Jim, Oakland Park

In response to the cover story “Raising Red Ribbon Awareness” in the Florida Agenda, December 1, 2011.

DEAR EDITOR,

I was surprised to read in the Florida Agenda last week that HIV/AIDS has been around since the 1930s. Your historical timeline was informational and interesting.

I attended the World AIDS Day rally at the Shoppes of Wilton Manors and was pleased to see such a wonderful turnout. It seems that people are more aware these days, or are just more open about it. I hope that everyone was there to support those who live with HIV or whom they have lost, and not just to see Margaret Cho.

Sincerely,
Jim Politano

In response to the news story “Few Americans with HIV Have it Under Control” in the Florida Agenda, December 1, 2011.

DEAR EDITOR,

As a gay man living with HIV in America, I find it disturbing to hear that only 28% of the 1.2 Million Americans living with HIV/AIDS have it under control. Does that mean that those who have the disease don’t take their meds? Do they have access to the proper medications that they need? In these times of economic hardships, it can be difficult to get the medicines they need. So if the CDC wants to help curb the spread of this disease, why can’t they put more money into programs like ADAP or Ryan White? We’re going to war in countries most of us will never go to, and yet one of the biggest fights we’re fighting at home, is the fight against HIV. Every month, for many of us, it’s a fight to get out of bed, let alone fight for our meds.
Sincerely,
K.E.

In response to the news story “Ricky Martin to Join the Cast of ‘Glee’” in the Florida Agenda, December 1, 2011.

Ricky Martin is going to join the cast of “Glee” next year. Really? Is that so newsworthy?
Anonymous

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In response to the editor’s opinion “Marriage? Get Real!” in the Florida Agenda, November 10, 2011.

DEAR EDITOR,
Thank you for your piece on the sanctity of marriage, you hit the nail on the head! We are happy to watch the desecration of the institution of marriage on tv, yet apparently we as a community cant take part. We aren’t perfect just like everyone else, so why shouldn’t we have the right to get married for 72 days in a multi-million dollar wedding and divorce. To be honest, divorce maybe a factor but I think celebrities are the biggest threat to marriage, look at the cover of any magazine and there is always some cheating spouse, I’m not saying by any stretch that gay people don’t cheat,  but so what if we do? We can’t do anything worse for marriage than the straights are doing!
Sincerely,
L. David

In response to the opinion, “Trans Relativity” in the Florida Agenda, November 17, 2011.

Dear Editor,
I would like to thank Rajindra for shining a light on the fact that trans people have a history. I didn’t know that and feel blessed to know that we aren’t alone, and have just as much right to exist in society as everyone else. I hope that her piece reaches schools and the government so that people will not only understand that being trans is not a choice, but that we have been in place, and were accepted in society hundreds of years ago. People need to be educated.

It takes a brave person to come forward and to shine that light to guide others in finding truth, I applaud Rajindra for doing this. Thank You!
Sincerely,
Angel Guettera

“THANK YOU” for all your wonderful letters over the past year. Keep them coming! You may send your letters to
editor@floridaagenda.com.

DEAR EDITOR,

In Florida each year, there are between 9,000 and 10,000 children who are removed from their home because they experienced neglect or abuse at the hands of a family member. It is no longer safe to live at home, at least for a while … but perhaps forever.*
If there are no relatives able to care for them, they are placed in a group home or with a foster family. What sets foster parents apart is their ability to love a child like one of their own, regardless of whether the child lives with them for a month or for more

than a year. Foster parents have the challenging task of providing an atmosphere that helps a child heal and prepare  to go back home, if possible, or on to a new permanent home. Foster parents are a vital resource for these children as they wait in limbo, between a past that was painful and a future that is uncertain.

The National Youth Advocate Program (NYAP) trains, licenses and manages foster homes for youth that are medically fragile, youth that have difficult behaviors, youth that have a recent history of or current problem with substance abuse, and youth that are gay, lesbian, transgender, bisexual, or questioning. Although there are many wonderful foster parents in Broward County, there is always a need for more.

If you are interested in becoming a foster parent with NYAP or learning more, please call 1-877-692-7226 or 954-596-5284.

Sincerely,
William A. Grear
NYAP Training Coordinator

*Information taken from The Department of Children & Families Website

Please send all your comments and letters to Editor@FloridaAgenda.com

In response to the Editorial “A Free Country?” in the Florida Agenda, Sept.

DEAR EDITOR,
I totally agree with your views. I am a German-American who grew up speaking German and English. I went to live in Germany. What a different view Germans have of sexuality! For more than 10 years Germans have had what they call the Homo-Ehe (gay marriage). My then-time boyfriend and now husband and I visited Germany last year. We were treated like a couple in all the hotels and organizations that we visited. Then, this year, he took me to meet his family in Brazil. Brazil has gay marriage, too, even though it is not called “marriage” – it carries all the same rights. So we got married on August 3rd. At first I thought that this was just a lark.

But as the public notary read us a very long list of our rights and obligations to each other I grasped how this would change our lives.

Unforntunately, my fellow countrymen here do not recognize our marriage. So we are planning on moving to Brazil within the next couple of years. What really bowled me over: everyone, but really everyone congratulated us. When we got to the customs check at the airport to leave Brazil, the official asked for our documents. I gave her my American passport and my new Brazilian ID card. She asked me why I have a Brazilian ID card. I told her that I had just married the man standing next to me. “Parabems!” she exclaimed (congratulations!) with a broad grin. We had to pay a lawyer in the US around $1,000 to draw up papers protecting us here. It cost us around $25,000 to get my husband his green card and then citizenship. Straights don’t have those fees. Furthermore, as a state employee, I am not allowed to put him on my healthcare. I wish that my fellow countrymen could grow up and finally see that we should be treated equally as we are in most of Europe, South Africa, Argentina, Brazil, parts of Mexico, and Canada.

Robb Kvasnak, Ed.D.

Please send all your comments and letters to Editor@FloridaAgenda.com

In response to the Editor’s Column, “Take Pride in Your Appearance!”, in the Florida Agenda, June 16th, 2011.

DEAR EDITOR,

I was reading the above issue of the Agenda and thinking how much it had improved. Particularly in the areas of news coverage as well as entertainment. Then I saw your “Opinion”. At first I thought it was just some personal notes and comments and then I glanced over to the masthead and saw you are the editor in chief.

Have you also been appointed the Wilton Manors Arbiter of Taste, Grooming and Appropriate Attire?

It has been a long time since I have read such pretentious trash in a gay newspaper. I fear for your psyche having to live, surrounded by the slovenly dressed residents of Fort Lauderdale. Perhaps you should move to the Upper East Side of NYC or Beverly Hills (but not east of Doheny). I fear for your stylist and the embarrassment he must have endured as you entered the salon. His colleagues must have cringed with the thought that perhaps he had been the one to over process your hair doing highlights.

If you think that linen and expensive loafers really make a difference here, you should have gone to work for Scott Rothstein. I am sure that everyone in his corrupt law firm was suitably attired in linen and Gucci’s and no one was ever foolish enough to take a meeting without being suitably attired (even w/ the police). The fact that you relate these meaningless aspects of attire to pride or substance makes me ill. Your comments about appropriate dress in an initial meeting are condescending and an insult to the community. I don’t own any sandals but anyone who wears them in a local bar or club deserves the horror of dirty feet. I only hope that the other staff members of Mark’s List are wise enough to follow your dress code.

Your comments regarding the lack of color sense in Fort Lauderdale are simply another indication of an intolerant attitude.  You missed your calling.

You should have been cast as the clothing guy on “Queer Eye”. You should make sure that Bravo has your resume and head shot in their files for the sequel.

Perhaps I am wrong.  Perhaps the clothing and shoe stores in the area have completely sold out of linen and expensive slip ons as a result of your missive. Perhaps that jam on southbound I-95 last week was not caused by an accident, but because of hordes of residents of Wilton Manors flocking to salons in status appropriate areas of Miami-Dade for color, highlights, manicures and pedicures.

I will continue to enjoy the news and entertainment areas of the Florida Agenda but, in order to avoid further offense, I shall avoid anything with your byline. You really should consider a stronger focus on editing and lessening your opinion writing.  Otherwise, your sensitivities would be more appreciated in Milan, Paris, London, Tokyo or Buenos Aires.  At all costs, refrain from visiting Rio, Honolulu, Singapore, Israel or India where you would be appalled at the manner of dress.

SINCERELY, J. P. COLBY

Please send all your comments and letters to Editor@FloridaAgenda.com

DEAR EDITOR,
I just finished reading your May 5 article on “Friends Without Benefits”. You are right on!! Thanks for writing the article.
IMO, friends either move here together, or people move here who already have friends living here. I moved here alone and had no friends here.  It’s very difficult to break into these pre-established friendship circles.

It didn’t take long after moving to FL from the Boston area to develop the very same perceptions in your article. I hang out mostly in coffee houses, not bars. But it’s the same story. I frequently end up having conversations with people I only see in the coffee house. It’s totally random when I’ll see anyone again. It could be months. Though they seem to enjoy talking with me, not one person has ever invited me to do anything outside of the coffee house. It makes no sense, that if two people enjoy talking with each other, that they can’t plan to meet and not wait for a random time when they’re both there.

So I tried swapping email addresses with one person and took the initiative to contact him. That lasted one email. If you ask for a phone number, that’s a real challenge to get someone interested. That means you’re hitting on him, and if you’re not his type, forget friends.

I totally agree with you that Florida attracts an unusual number of flaky people.  I would go one step further. You may not agree with this, but I think the outdoor playland culture here also attracts less intelligent people. I’ve lived in different places in the US. I’ve never met so many people who are less intelligent and less educated than anywhere else I’ve lived.

Educated doesn’t have to mean having a lot of degrees. By educated, I mean being able and interested in conversing on a wide variety of issues. But few people here care about issues. All they care about is: real estate, the gym, clubs and the beach. This doesn’t exactly attract your intellectual types. It’s no surprise that Broward County has the highest HIV rate among gay men in the US.

Lack of education and a carefree attitude account for that.

I believe Americans, in general, have become more selfish and self-absorbed. Gay men reflect the larger society. However, I do think that gay men in Florida are especially selfish and self-absorbed.

Sorry for the longer email. If you read this far, I thank you.

Best Wishes,
BARRY

Please send all your comments and letters to editor@FloridaAgenda.com

Dear Editor,

KUDOS for Jessica Osman’s “Papa, Can You Hear Me?”

In her March 17 op-ed, she was so right when she said that for EQUAL RIGHTS we should take the word “marriage” out of the equation and go for words that would grant equality, such as “civil unions.” In the aura of separation of church and state, our fight has been from the religious zealots protecting the sanctity of their hallowed “marriage.” Why should we care what we call it as long as we get the legal rights we constitutionally deserve? I would like for my partner of 17 years to be able to inherit my social security benefits, along with the other thousand or so benefits a legal union provides, and I don’t think there would be so much objection to this if a different term other than “marriage” were used. Let’s get the EQUAL RIGHTS first, which I am sure most people do not object to, then if semantics need be involved that issue could be addressed down the line. My “husband” and myself were legally “married” in Canada, but if the words were “domestic partner” or “civil partner” it certainly wouldn’t matter to us.  C’mon, gay America, let’s get over this hurdle and, as Jessica stated, “find the middle ground.” I’m sure our battle for equality would be greatly streamlined.
Sincerely,
Mike Gaupin
(And Jon Gorcyca)

Dear Editor

Your article on Sexual Racism or Just a Preference really made me think about my own life. Years ago, I had a serious weight problem and still struggle with it on a daily basis.

I thought about all the times I would see someone on the street and they would look at me with disgust. I remember the times I would see someone that I was interested in meeting, smile at them and they would not return the smile or look the other way or online in a chat room when the “what’s your stats” question would come up and would answer honestly and there would be no reply after … it hurt. Sexual Racism or Just a Preference, could it be both?  Then I started to think about have I excluded someone based on this?  Were they too short or tall, did they have a couple of extra pounds or were they too thin, not muscular enough? I realize as I get older … why would I exclude anyone? If you exclude someone you are really excluding yourself from possibly meeting someone really special or possibly missing out experiencing something new because of this person. I now say hello to the person walking down the street. If they extend their hand for a handshake I will extend my hand as well. If I don’t I may never know if I missed out on meeting someone truly spectacular.

Sincerely,
Joe Liquori