It’s just another Thursday in an otherwise unremarkable week. As per my routine, I’m wearing a pair of sweat pants complete with bleach stains and a drawstring waist sans the string, a ratty T-shirt with a hole in it and I have my pink rubber gloves on that I wear when cleaning the bathroom. I have a bandana wrapped on my head ala some 50s housewife in curlers. My face is covered with a clay masque, which followed an exfoliating masque and which itself will be followed by a soothing green tea masque.
Why am I sharing the mundane details of my cleaning and grooming habits? Because I’ve often wondered if anyone else’s weekend routine started the day before the actual night out and if it were as complex as mine. After the house has been vacuumed, dusted and scrubbed and my face has been plucked, sucked and sandblasted, it’s time for wardrobe selection. I can’t just throw on any old thing. Wardrobe needs to be appropriate for the venue, with whom you are going, mood and so forth.
I spent my formative early gay years with the lesser celebrity “jet set” in New York City. Every night was a party, a fundraiser, or some new club and there was an unspoken dress code.
The velvet ropes carefully keeping the crowds out of certain night spots were not just there to hold people back and let the “right” people in. Those ropes and the guards behind them were centurions with a flair for fashion and an eye for the “it” people. There they stood, ear pieces in, clip-boards in hand practically motionless except for their eyes which were constantly scanning the crowd to make sure who shouldn’t be waiting wasn’t. I’m not ashamed to say that, way back when, I myself was in with the “right” crowd. It may seem shallow and superficial, but damned if I didn’t have some fabulous times.
When I moved to my beloved Fort Liquordale, wardrobe proved to be just as important. The right clothes for the right clubs and, I’ll admit, also I needed to plan the “right” substances I’d be doing that evening (I no longer use or approve of the use of illicit drugs, As my readers know, I’ve made some mistakes in the past and I’ve paid very dearly for them).
South Beach, Oy! Now that was always crazy. I’d have to start prepping on a Wednesday because a new outfit had to be bought. When surrounded by men built like Abercrombie and Fitch models, who you knew would be shirtless in 12 minutes and when you’re pretty much a thin, average boy – you just had to have a designer on your ass.
Now, every time I get ready, I find myself staring blankly the same rack of clothing, hoping something I haven’t worn before would magically appear, unless of course I’d been shopping, and naturally I can never decide what to wear on the first try.
Could I squeeze into those jeans that I haven’t worn in two years but used to look so good? After a struggle of epic proportions, I find that horray, they fit well as long as I don’t breath, put anything in my pockets or have to bend over. So off they come.
After several failed attempts and growing tired of looking in the mirror, I decide on the basic black suit that I was thinking about wearing in the first place anyway. Having accomplished what I had to do, I bring my essentials (tranquilizer, my teddy bear and the remote control) to bed.
I lie in my bed and stare at the television, my thoughts ranging from should I repaint the living room to whether or not I should wear a little eyeliner tomorrow.
Yet as tomorrow arrives, and after all the work of bearing the production of going out, I decide I am too tired, instead I settle for an evening with the TV and go to bed! “Welcome to middle age.” Maybe now, I’ll buy different pairs of “designer” sheets!
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By Tom Bonanti
Face the facts. We are living in very stressful times. Worrying about your job and this crappy economy, not getting enough sleep, poor nutritional habits, etc. are just a few of the factors that speed up the aging process in one hell of a hurry. You can use botox, collagen and a top notch plastic surgeon to fight off the ravages of Father Time, but you may just go broke in the process. Result: more damn stress! Why not let The Florida Agenda offer a few cost-free suggestions this week on how to eliminate some of your stress and the wrinkles that come with it!
Remember when your mother told you to stop scowling or your face would freeze that way? Well, your old lady had a point. Every time you cop a facial expression, tiny creases form underneath the surface of your skin; the more you do the expression, the deeper the creases. As you age and your skin loses moisture and elasticity, these lines turn into permanent deep grooves. Hint: so that you won’t end up looking like one of the apple trees in the “Wizard of Oz,” try to keep your eyes, eyebrows and forehead relaxed. Also, try sleeping on your back and avoid sleeping on your side with your face scrunched up in the pillow. Yes, more time on your back will keep you looking younger! And don’t forget the importance of moisturizing your skin at night and in the morning before you go to work.
Yo-yo or crash diets are a “no-no”! While it’s tempting to starve yourself or try a new gimmick to shed fat fast, such strategies can wreak havoc with your heart, cause bagging, sagging skin, and make you fatter in the long run. Eat healthy and exercise regularly starting today! That waist and butt didn’t blimp out overnight, so it only makes sense that you can’t tone up and trim down and acquire a gorgeous body overnight. Diet wisely by losing only one to three pounds per week and always combine a sound nutritional plan with a program of wise, consistent exercise.
Stop smoking and eating so many sweets. Both of these vices can cause wrinkles by speeding up the degradation of elastin and collagen, both crucial skin proteins. In addition, cigarette smoking can dry out your skin and give you bad breath and yellow teeth. Lovely! Try eating more fruit instead of cupcakes and brownies. Try replacing cigarettes with more sex. Great cardio!
Life is a bitch and then you die – and stress is here to stay. But when stress makes you feel out of control, certain catabolic hormones, like cortisol, adrenaline and neurodrenaline, rage wildly in your body speeding up the aging process. Try deep-breathing activities like yoga and meditation—both can be done anywhere. Try listening to classical music. A little Mozart can make you calmer
and smarter, too. Masturbation is also a great stress releaser, but not recommended at your job.
A great tan is sexy. But years of baking and broiling can also cause skin to become dry, splotchy and wrinkled. To prevent these casualties and worse, use a sunscreen, a minimum of SPF-15 daily and your skin will retain its moisture and absorb the sun’s cancer fighting and bone building Vitamin D.
Here’s to youth, beauty, joy and happiness. Remember, life is too short to be stressed and miserable. For more fitness tips, contact TrainerTomB@aol.com!
Tom Bonanti, is a certified personal trainer and owner of Pump’n Inc gym at 1271 NE 9th Ave., Ft. Lauderdale, FL, Email: TrainerTomB@aol.com Facebook: TrainerTomB. www.pumpnincgym.com
]]>MIAMI, FL – The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force announced that straight rugby star Ben Cohen will receive its Humanitarian Award on October 15th, at the 15th annual Miami Recognition Dinner at the Fontainebleau Miami Beach. Cohen is the first straight sports star to dedicate his philanthropic efforts to the benefit of LGBT people. One of the world’s greatest athletes, Ben recently founded and serves as chairman of The Ben Cohen StandUp Foundation, the world’s first foundation dedicated to raising awareness about the long-term, damaging effects of bullying and raising funds to support those who are doing work to stop it.
The Miami Recognition Dinner is the premier annual celebration of South Florida’s lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) community. The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force produces the event and donates the majority of the net proceeds to other nonprofit organizations serving the Miami-Dade LGBT community.
Pride Center Expands Efforts to Reach GBTQ/MSM with Addictions
FT. LAUDERDALE, FL – The Pride Center at Equality Park, in association with Lambda Men’s Brotherhood, have created a new social networking program
called Youth Gay Meth Free (YGMF). YGMF caters to the young GBTQ men in South Florida who struggle with crystal methamphetamine addiction – commonly known as “Crystal,” “Tina” or “Ice” – along with other substances.
YGMF is currently available on Facebook, Twitter and Tumblr, with the goal of grabbing the attention of young GBTQ males with these tragic addictions.
“I’m very excited about this new program because there are so many young men struggling with additions,” said Mitchell Jerus, Youth Coordinator running the YGMF Program. “We already have much of our online social networking programs in place and very soon we will have a peer counseling program both online and offline.
“These young men often feel alone with no one to talk to about their problems,” continued Jerus. “That’s why we’re here, so they know they’re not alone and that someone is there to help. We anticipate this program will be very successful and we’re using the slogan ‘Get Your Shine Back’ showing these young men that they can emerge from their dark places.
“Numerous indicators confirm problematic crystal methamphetamine use among some sexually active men who have sex with other men. GBTQ/MSM young people’s questions regarding sexual identity and sexual behavior need to be addressed. These young men need skills to address and resist using substances as they become exposed to new behavioral options in the gay community.”
“In my experience catering to LGBTQ youth and their families, many of the young men I’ve met that use crystal meth are young sex workers: dancers, go-go boys, adult film performers, escorts, etc.,” said Listron “Blue” Mannix, Expanding Testing Initiative Manger overseeing the YGMF program.
“We’re reaching out to other organizations that can help this program flourish and become the hope for a better future to others that it’s supposed to be,” concluded Jerus. “We feel that by collaborating with programs such as Meth and Men, the Sunserve Youth Group, MProject and other treatment centers, that young men struggling can get the help that they need and deserve.”
The core of this program is located at the Pride Center at Equality Park on Dixie Highway in Wilton Manors, or by going online to Facebook and looking for “YouthGay MethFree”.
For additional information, email youthmethfree@pridecenterflorida.org or call (954) 463-9005.
Johnny’s Plans Entire Labor Day Weekend Schedule
FORT LAUDERDALE/MIAMI, FL – Both locations of Johnny’s is planning a Labor Day Weekend schedule. What a way to end the summer!
Paolo Pincente Named Executive Producer Miami Beach Gay Pride
MIAMI BEACH, FL –Veteran event director and producer Paolo Pincente has been named executive producer of the Miami Beach Gay Pride Parade & Festival for 2012, announced Babak Movahedi, president of the Pride Board of Directors. “Miami Beach Pride is fortunate to have someone of Paolo’s diverse background and experience as next year’s executive producer,” Movahedi said. “In three short years, Miami Beach Pride has grown from a hometown celebration to one that captures national, if not international, attention.
For the fourth event, we look forward to having Paolo add his distinctive touch and take Pride to a whole new level.”
In his new role, Pincente will help plan and oversee all elements of next year’s Miami Beach Gay Pride event as well as related activities leading up to Pride. Now in its fourth year, Miami Beach Gay Pride will take place Sunday, April 15, 2012, along Miami Beach’s famed Ocean Drive.
In addition to his responsibilities for Pride, Pincente currently works and produces events for top-tier venues and well-known brands including, Space Nightclub, Miami, as general manager; Mova Lounge, Miami Beach, as operations and marketing consultant; Svedka Vodka, throughout Florida, as event producer; Source Events, Miami, as event manager; and the Surfcomber Hotel, Miami Beach, as event producer. His previous experience in the hospitality industry has also included Crobar Nightclubs in New York City, Chicago and Miami Beach; Mia Biscayne, Miami; Exit 66 Nightclub, Ft. Lauderdale; and Cameo Nightclub in Miami Beach, where he has served in diverse operations, management, marketing, training and event-related capacities.
The mission of Miami Beach Gay Pride is to bring together members of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender community, their friends, allies, and supporters in celebration of the unique spirit and culture of the LGBT community by producing free, safe, quality mass-appeal events that are open to all, including the Parade, Festival and allied Miami Beach Pride sanctioned events. For more information; www.miamibeachgaypride.com.
Teacher Suspended for Being Gay Porn Star
MIAMI, FL – In January, Shawn Loftis, a Miami-Dade County substitute teacher, was suspended from his position. In April, Loftis’ teacher’s certificate was revoked despite his insistence that his porn days were over.
Loftis also worked as a citizen reporter for CNN.
Loftis, who went by the stage name Collin O’Neal, resigned his porn career in 2010 but is still widely known for his porn work. His video work included Mirage, Lord of the Jungle, Humping Iron, Crossing the Line, Rising Sun, Desperate Husbands, Scorched, The Hard Way, Mo’ Bubble Butt, Perfect Fit and Skuff II: Downright Filthy.
However, Loftis/O’Neal also produced and directed his own series, known as “World of Men,” where, as O’Neal, he visited various exotic locations looking for sex. These locations included London, Lebanon, São Paulo, Miami, Spain, Edinburgh, Berlin and Serbia. O’Neal’s videos not only served as sex films, but were also travelogues showing some of the famous sites in the various cities. It is from these locations that, as Loftis, he submitted some of his iReport segments for CNN.
O’Neal’s hard-core performances won him several awards. The “World of Men” series has been nominated many times for awards and World of Men: Lebanon has won a GayVN Award for Best Pro/Am Release and a Grabby Award for Best Videography jointly for Collin O’Neal and Dan Fox, again for Lebanon.
O’Neal said that CNN knew about his porn past and didn’t have a problem with it, but can’t believe that the Miami-Dade School Board would, since he gave up the business.
Symposium on Aging
MIAMI, FL – The Miami-Dade Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce (MDGLCC) will hold a Symposium on Aging with the objective to educate and explore the needs of the LGBT community. The Symposium will be held on Saturday, September 24, from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m. at the Hyatt Regency Miami, 400 SE 2nd Avenue in Miami.
The Symposium on Aging seeks to open a discussion and create an understanding of the needs and expectations of this powerful and growing segment of the LGBT community.
The fee for admission, which includes seated lunch and refreshments throughout the day, is $35 for members of the MDGLCC and $55 for non-members. The event is open to the public. Limited space is available. RSVP required.
For complete details, visit www.gogaymiami.com (“Symposium on Aging” tab), call (305) 673-4440 or email mdglcc@bellsouth.net.
Jon Peterson to Appear at Miami Beach Stage Door Theater
MIAMI BEACH, FL – Starting on Saturday, September 10th, the Miami Beach Stage Door Theatre presents “Song Man Dance Man,” a one-man show about one-man shows created and performed by Jon Peterson, emcee from Broadway’s revival of “Cabaret” and Drama Desk Nominee for the title role in the off-Broadway production “George M. Cohan Tonight!”
“Song Man Dance Man” is about seven performers who captured the eyes, ears and hearts of their audiences. They are Fred Astaire and Gene Kelly, whose unique styles transformed the movie musical; Donald O’Connor and Sammy Davis, Jr., both geniuses who had to struggle for appropriate recognition; Bobby Darin, who made the leap from ‘50s pop-star to sophisticated concert artist; the eccentric, brilliant Anthony Newley, whose pulsating, emotional style reverberated throughout the musical theater world; and, of course, George M. Cohan, who invented the song and dance man.
“I wanted to remind people of just how good it can be; of how magical the world of show business was in those golden days because of these performers,” says Peterson about why he was motivated to create the one-man show. “The dazzling talent and charisma of these artists inspire life-changing devotion.”
“Song Man Dance Man” Performances: Saturdays at 2 and 8 p.m. on September 10, 17 and 24. Tickets are $38 for the matinee and $42 for the evening performance and are available at the box office at Miami Beach Stage Door Theatre at the Byron Carlyle, 500 71st Street, Miami Beach, by calling (305) 397-8977 or purchase online at www.stagedoorfl.org.
Hamilton Gallery to Host GLBX After Hours
FORT LAUDERDALE, FL – Hamilton Gallery at 615 East Las Olas Boulevard will be hosting the Gay and Lesbian Business Exchange (GLBX) After Hours Networking event on Thursday, September 22, from 5:30 to 7:00 p.m. GLBX is a Council of The Greater Fort Lauderdale Chamber of Commerce. Exchange events are free for members.
“We plan our socials at various members’ businesses so we can enjoy a variety of venues and also give everyone the opportunity to learn first hand about that member’s business,” said Julian Cavazos, GLBX Chair. “We’re looking forward to meeting at Janice Hamilton’s Gallery.”
The Greater Fort Lauderdale Chamber of Commerce is the first Chamber in the State of Florida and one of the first in the nation to recognize the LGBT community as a major component of their membership. “The contributions of the Gay and Lesbian Community within our city and surrounding area is major driver to our local economy. The mission of the Chamber is to drive economic growth for the Greater Fort Lauderdale community; it was recognized that the Gay and Lesbian Community needed to be included in a manner to unite and connect, giving an inclusive voice to continue to attract new Gay and Lesbian businesses,” Mr. Cavazos explained.
For information or reservations, contact Drew Miller at (954) 462-6000 ext 8775.
South Florida Cities Rank Highest LGBT Households Concentrations
OAKLAND PARK, FL – Both Wilton Manors and Oakland Park ranked in the top-ten nationwide in the concentration of same-sex households in the United States. According to the 2010 U.S. Census, Wilton Manors ranked second in the nation with, 140 same-sex households per 1,000, and Oakland Park ranked tenth in the nation with 8.8 same-sex households for every 1,000. Provincetown, Massachusetts, came in first place, in front of Wilton Manors.
Sidelines Announces 3rd Round Cook-Off Winners
WILTON MANORS, FL – Sidelines Sports Bar held its last round of their Summer Cook-Off Competition before the Finals. The category for this round of the cook-off competition was Summer Salads.
The recipes included a candied pecan salad tossed with greens and a homemade dressing, a cauliflower and chicken salad, a couscous salad, a chicken salad with grapes and apples, to name just a few. However, Randy Harmon’s black-eyed pea pasta salad earned him first-place; John Woodward came in second-place and was also awarded the People’s Choice honor; Sonia Aguero came in third for her “Mama’s Potato and Chicken Salad”.
The top three winners are now eligible for the “Finals Challenge,” scheduled for Sunday, September 4th (Labor Day Weekend), at 5:00 p.m.
WIN to Hold “Metaphysical Fair”
WILTON MANORS, FL – Women in Network (WIN) will be holding a Metaphysical Fair on Wednesday, September 7, at 7 p.m. at the Pride Center at Equality Park, 2040 N. Dixie Highway in Wilton Manors. Here’s your chance to ask what you never dared to ask before and your chance to learn more and speak to people who are experts in reiki, psychic ability, yoga, acupuncture and more. Admission is $5 for WIN members and $10 for non-members.
Rescue & Rejoice
WILTON MANORS, FL – Abandoned Pet Rescue will be holding Rescue & Rejoice, an event to raise funds since the organization is run solely on donations they receive. The fundraiser will be held at Allied Kitchen and Bath on September 13, from 6 to 8 p.m., and is co-sponsored by The Cabanas Guesthouse & Spa.
Abandoned Pet Rescue takes abandoned pets off the streets of South Florida and gives them veterinary care and places them in permanent, loving homes. APR is the only “no kill” shelter in Broward County and all contributions made are tax-deductible and all the proceeds go towards the shelter.
Suggested donations include gift certificates and other merchandise that will hold a value in an auction environment.
For more information on the Rescue & Rejoice event, or if your donation is something that needs to be picked up, please call Geri at (954) 581-6423 or send email to apr954@aol.com.
Florida Teacher in Trouble for Anti-Gay Facebook Posts
MOUNT DORA, FL – Jerry Buell, a Florida-based teacher, was suspended from the classroom while the Lake County School Board investigates Facebook messages in which he said he “almost threw up” when he heard about New York’s marriage equality, which he said was also part of a “cesspool”. Buell had been Mount Dora High School’s “Teacher of the Year”.
According to the Orlando Sentinel, Buell told them that his posts, which were visible to his friends and his network only, were not made out of hate but instead on how he interprets things.
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He will be updating people on HIV and aging research. Vergel is a chemical engineer who has become a leading advocate for sports nutrition, supplementation and the promotion of wellness in the HIV-positive community since his diagnosis in 1986. He is also the author of “Testosterone: A Man’s Guide” and co-author of the book “Built to survive”, the founder of the non-profit organizations Body Positive Wellness Clinic and Program for Wellness Restoration, The Nutrition and Exercise forum expert and TheBody.com, and a bilingual speaker on lipodystrophy, wasting, exercise, nutrition, testosterone replacement, metabolic disorders, HIV medication side effect management and HIV salvage therapy. Nelson is also PozHealth, one of the largest HIV health discussion online listservers.
For more info go to www.powerusa.org
There will be refreshments. The event will be held at Fusion 2304 NE 7th Avenue, Wilton Manors, FL 33305. (954) 630-1655.
]]>“Growing older can be a graceful process of evolution and discovery. ” – Tom Bonanti
By TOM BONANTI
Father Time is no benevolent “daddy” as he wields his sickle and yields to no one. Whether you’re a tasty twink just beginning to experience life, or a burley bear who’s been around longer than Cher and cockroaches, time ravages onward leaving only wrinkles and wreckage in its wake.
I suppose I’m sounding a bit negative, but there are things you can do right now to slow the aging process and feel years younger. Why not try a few of these happy, healthy and cheap suggestions before shelling out a fortune to the plastic surgeon!
Eat less sugar.
Sugar depletes your body of important minerals needed for a healthy metabolism. It depresses the immune system making your body susceptible to evil little pathogens that will make you sick. High glycemic diets – high in refined sugars and processed foods (bagels, donuts, fried fast food, and white bread) have now been associated with many forms of cancer. Sugary diets raise triglycerides and increase the risk of diabetes and heart disease. Go with whole grains, fresh fruits and veggies…you’ll live longer and have tons of energy to stay active!
Quiet your mind and meditate a little everyday. Stress can cause or at least exacerbate every major disease. The stress hormone cortisol can actually shrink the hippocampus, the part of the brain essential to thinking and memory. High levels of cortisol can also cause you to store more blood sugar and accumulate more ugly, stubborn blubber around your middle. Take a few moments everyday, put on some calming music, light some candles and try to meditate, calm down and relax.
Eat more fish! The Omega-3 fatty acids in fish are among the most heart healthy on the planet. Eating fish can help lower blood pressure, improve your mood and feed your brain. Only two servings of broiled or baked fish a week or ½ gram of fish oil a day from fish or supplements is all you need to accrue the benefits of consuming man’s fine scaly friends.
Doctors often don’t check homocysteine levels, but they should. According to experts, the lower your homocysteine, the healthier you are. A level of 9 umol more or less is generally considered optimal. Those with higher levels are dangerously at risk for heart attacks and strokes. Simply by supplementing with these three common B vitamins – Folic Acid, B6 and B12 you can bring homocysteine levels back to normal.
There’s no better anti-aging strategy in the universe than daily exercise. Anaerobic weight training twice a week for ½ to 1 hour will tighten and tone muscles and strengthen bones and joints. Working out 3-4 times a week for the same amount of time can help you build the lean muscle that will rev up your metabolism . Aerobic exercise 2-3 times per week for ½ hour to 45 minutes is sure to strengthen your heart and lungs and help you burn fat. Regular exercise relieves depression and anxiety; it lowers blood pressure and cholesterol; and it helps you to control your weight and maintain a “smokin” bod.
In 2011, make more connections. People who live and work and socialize with other folks live longer and enjoy life more. Making friends, volunteering or working for a cause and just having good friends and enjoying conversations are life-extending and health enriching. After all, “People who need people, are the luckiest people in the world.”
Growing older can be a graceful process of evolution and discovery. Keeping fit, feeling great, and looking like a million bucks while you’re doing it takes work, some common sense, and a little love for the person you are!
Tom Bonanti, is a certified personal
trainer and owner of Pump’n Inc gym
at 1271 NE 9th Avenue, Fort
Lauderdale, FL 33304, Facebook:
TrainerTomB. www.pumpnincgym.com