Florida Agenda

“Any treatment [for alcoholism] must be directed first toward behavior modification— including a diet that is alcohol free”

By Andy Kress

Alcoholism is a chronic disorder, and a growing issue within the LGBT community. Since this is a progressive disease, there is a fine line between being a heavy drinker and a compulsive one—the textbook definition of an alcoholic. The World Health Organization has listed alcoholism as one of the three most deadly killer diseases of the 20th century.

Alcohol, by its very nature is foreign, since it is not a product found in nature. It results from decomposition of fruits, grains and vegetables, and as such belongs to a family of poisons. Ethyl alcohol, the main intoxicating ingredient in wine, beer, and distilled liquor is a toxic drug that depresses the brain and nervous system. Although alcohol is fattening, it isn’t a food and is not changed or digested in any way. It is quickly absorbed in the blood stream and then travels to every part of the body, adversely affecting vital organs like the brain and liver.

There are a few tell tale signs of a true alcoholic, a puffy face and red blood-shot eyes among them. The alcoholic’s voice will be very hoarse and raspy, and they tend to have a rapid pulse, due to the alcohol’s thinning effects on the blood. Often irritable and over-emotional in their actions, many tend to be very suspicious of others. Bouts of delirium and black-outs of time are another chronic symptom. So, too, is repeated vomiting throughout the day.

Since the true alcoholic would rather drink than eat, it is easy for them to become very emaciated, with their skin becoming dehydrated and wrinkled. Because alcoholism is principally a psychological disease, any treatment must be directed first toward behavior modification— including a diet that is alcohol-free. In its place, the drinking of orange juice multiple times a day serves three purposes: One, the habit of drinking is satisfied; two, the juice helps rehydrate the body; and three, orange juice provides needed vitamins and minerals. A simple multivitamin taken with massive amounts of leafy vegetables are essential, as well, to provide fiber and reintroduce the stomach to processing solid food.

Legumes, starches, pastas and other carbohydrates provide long-lasting energy between meals. Enriched cereals and breads fill the stomach and are a good source of foliate and thiamine. Poultry is low in saturated fats and is a good source of lean protein to help build and repair muscles that have been damaged through inactivity. Poultry is often mild in taste and easy to digest.

Seafood is another protein that is lower in fats and cholesterols; this will help aid in the body’s muscle retention. Seafood is also loaded with many vitamins and minerals lost in the over consumption of alcohol. Lean pork is another fine choice when fighting the effects of alcoholism. Pork has a variety of different vitamins and minerals than chicken or seafood, as well as being a good source of healthy protein.

If you know or are related to an alcoholic, remember there is a good chance that they won’t be reading this article, since their word-mind association process is impaired by their disease. Share the information freely, knowing that you are helping to save someone’s life. You may even be saving lives more than you know, since drunk drivers are a major threat to innocent victims on our highways.

Andy Kress is a certified fitness trainer, yoga instructor and nutritional counselor in Fort Lauderdale, FL. For more nutritional tips or inspired exercise routines, reach him at 954-789-3930 or via email at andyfitnesstrainer@gmail.com

By Christian Taylor-Alexander

It starts off like any other relationship. A friend probably introduces you and before you know it, there’s magic in the air. A feeling of happiness … the stress and mundane details fade into the background as you and your new acquaintance get to know each other.

There’s music in the air, dark smoky lighting encompasses the room … people seem to be more friendly with you now that you are with your new companion. You might find that although you are usually kind of shy at the nightclub/bar, you are now talking to complete strangers. And, you are having the time of your life!

A little time passes and that feeling of bliss seems to be fading and your boring old self is coming back to the surface. Ah, but it’s early, and so and so said it was ok … so you and your new “friend” make your way through the crowds to the rest room. There, you and your new “acquaintance” can be alone for a moment. You probably stand there nervously for a few moments, wondering if anyone knows what you are really doing in that bathroom stall. Since you are new to this particular situation, you may not know what to do.

In this case, I am speaking of cocaine. Our character dips his car key into that little plastic zip-lock bag (point to ponder, I understand why they make sandwichsized baggies, but what else did they have in mind for those oh-so-perfect-for-carrying- drugs bags?), pulls out a pile of white powder, carefully balanced so as not to spill any, and inhales some in each nostril as he watched his friend do earlier. Within seconds, he can feel the numbness descending into his body. Within minutes that feeling of bliss begins to return. Maybe a little more so this time, because he did twice the amount as before. Not on purpose, it’s just the way it happened.

There are also countless persons who are introduced to other seductive strangers. These people were properly introduced by a trusted doctor. Who would doubt a stranger that promised to help your problems or take your pain away or better help you cope with the things that keep you up at night or make your mind race all day.

This new stranger seems perfect.

Our doctor’s convince us that if we take this little pill or that little tablet, we will feel better. Our friends coerce us into trying this substance or that, because it will make us feel better. This begs the question, how bad did we feel in the first place?

Before you know it (I can’t give you a precise time frame), but your new “friend” becomes a constant companion. Kids getting on your nerves? Take a pill. Tennis elbow annoying you again? There are pain pills in the cabinet. Going out for the evening and don’t have much energy

? Do a few lines. Want to really take a break from reality, drop some acid. It’s OK, everyone else is doing it. “My doctor prescribes them.” “All my friends are doing it.” (Given enough time we can rationalize anything.)

As time passes, one of two things can happen. For roughly 8% of the people I have known in my personal life, they are able to put down that drink, flush that cocaine or crystal meth, special K (no relation to the cereal), ecstasy, GHB, acid, Quaaludes (for you party boys in the 70’s) and the rest of the drug alphabet and walk away. My hat’s off to you.

The other 92%, don’t always fair so well. I am one of them. As time went by, I found myself growing ever more dependent on anything that would let me forget my life for a while and let me live in my imaginary little world where I actually was happy with who I was (ironically enough, the way I felt before I fell into the pit of addiction). Money started to get tight, I found myself falling asleep at my desk, I started losing contact with people whom I deeply cared about who genuinely cared about me.

Everything, however slowly or quickly, WILL fall apart.

Addiction is nothing short of a type of cancer. A cancer of the soul. The saddest thing is, all the people who really care about you (who stuck it out) can just stand by and watch you slowly killing yourself. So, with a nod to Nancy Reagan, “Just Say No.”

Task Force to Honor  Rugby Star

MIAMI, FL – The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force announced that straight rugby star Ben Cohen will receive its Humanitarian Award on October 15th, at the 15th annual Miami Recognition Dinner at the Fontainebleau Miami Beach. Cohen is the first straight sports star to dedicate his philanthropic efforts to the benefit of LGBT people. One of the world’s greatest athletes, Ben recently founded and serves as chairman  of The Ben Cohen StandUp Foundation, the world’s first foundation dedicated to raising awareness about the long-term, damaging effects of bullying and raising funds to support those who are doing work to stop it.

The Miami Recognition Dinner is the premier annual celebration of South Florida’s lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) community. The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force produces the event and donates the majority of the net proceeds to other nonprofit organizations serving the Miami-Dade LGBT community.

Pride Center Expands Efforts to Reach GBTQ/MSM with Addictions

FT. LAUDERDALE, FL – The Pride Center at Equality Park, in association with Lambda Men’s Brotherhood, have created a new social networking program

called Youth Gay Meth Free (YGMF). YGMF caters to the young GBTQ men in South Florida who struggle with crystal methamphetamine addiction – commonly known as “Crystal,” “Tina” or “Ice” – along with other substances.

YGMF is currently available on Facebook, Twitter and Tumblr, with the goal of grabbing the attention of young GBTQ males with these tragic addictions.

“I’m very excited about this new program because there are so many young men struggling with additions,” said Mitchell Jerus, Youth Coordinator running the YGMF Program. “We already have much of our online social networking programs in place and very soon we will have a peer counseling program both online and offline.

“These young men often feel alone with no one to talk to about their problems,” continued Jerus. “That’s why we’re here, so they know they’re not alone and that someone is there to help. We anticipate this program will be very successful and we’re using the slogan ‘Get Your Shine Back’ showing these young men that they can emerge from their dark places.

“Numerous indicators confirm problematic crystal methamphetamine use among some sexually active men who have sex with other men. GBTQ/MSM young people’s questions regarding sexual identity and sexual behavior need to be addressed. These young men need skills to address and resist using substances as they become exposed to new behavioral options in the gay community.”

“In my experience catering to LGBTQ youth and their families, many of the young men I’ve met that use crystal meth are young sex workers: dancers, go-go boys, adult film performers, escorts, etc.,” said Listron “Blue” Mannix, Expanding Testing Initiative Manger overseeing the YGMF program.

“We’re reaching out to other organizations that can help this program flourish and become the hope for a better future to others that it’s supposed to be,” concluded Jerus. “We feel that by collaborating with programs such as Meth and Men, the Sunserve Youth Group, MProject and other treatment centers, that young men struggling can get the help that they need and deserve.”

The core of this program is located at the Pride Center at Equality Park on Dixie Highway in Wilton Manors, or by going online to Facebook and looking for “YouthGay MethFree”.

For additional information, email youthmethfree@pridecenterflorida.org or call (954) 463-9005.

Johnny’s Plans Entire Labor Day Weekend Schedule

FORT LAUDERDALE/MIAMI, FL – Both locations of Johnny’s is planning a Labor Day Weekend schedule. What a way to end the summer!

• There will be a Labor Day strip show night at both locations starting at 6 p.m. Friday in Ft. Lauderdale and Saturday and Sunday in
• Miami. Hosted by Sol Delight. No cover Sunday through Thursday in Fort Lauderdale and no cover seven nights a week in Miami.
• T.P. Lords and D.J. Robby Sky present “Drag On” Mondays at Johnny’s Miami. No cover. Drags and Trans drink free from 10 p.m. to midnight. Everyone else $3 drinks all night long.
• Thursdays are Latin Night (18+) at Johnny’s Miami and no cover all night long. Shows by Teresita La Caliente and Marytrini. D.J.
• Lannier Alvarez spins. Sexy underwear contest at 1 1 p.m. with $1,000 in cash and prizes. Free Cuba Libres from 10 p.m. to midnight, $5 after.
• Fridays are GRINDR night at Johnny’s Miami – 18+ college night. No cover all night long. With hot male dancers and D.J. Miik spinning.
• Labor Day Weekend Countdown featuring the Beyonce mix tape on Friday, September 2nd at Johnny’s Fort Lauderdale. Free CD giveaways all night long. Free drinks (well and domestic) from 11:30 p.m. to midnight. Reduced cover after with text “B@MFL” to 31313. $39 Moscato D’Asti bottles, $12 huge big bucket drinks all night. With D.J. TPromix.
• “The Spot” on Saturday, September 3 – “Fire” the hottest in pop, hip-hop and Latin with D.J. TPromix, 40 hot dancers and no cover all night at Johnny’s Miami.
• South Florida’s largest Amateur Strip Contest at Johnny’s Ft. Lauderdale on Sunday nights. No cover all night long. Karaoke from 9 p.m. hosted by D.J. Miik Emceed by Gemini Stone. $3 Margarita Madness all day and night. $1,000 in cash and prizes, but must sign up by midnight.

Paolo Pincente Named Executive Producer Miami Beach Gay Pride

MIAMI BEACH, FL –Veteran event director and producer Paolo Pincente has been named executive producer of the Miami Beach Gay Pride Parade & Festival for 2012, announced Babak Movahedi, president of the Pride Board of Directors.   “Miami Beach Pride is fortunate to have someone of Paolo’s diverse background and experience as next year’s executive producer,” Movahedi said. “In three short years, Miami Beach Pride has grown from a hometown celebration to one that captures national, if not international, attention.

For the fourth event, we look forward to having Paolo add his distinctive touch and take Pride to a whole new level.”

In his new role, Pincente will help plan and oversee all elements of next year’s Miami Beach Gay Pride event as well as related activities leading up to Pride.  Now in its fourth year, Miami Beach Gay Pride will take place Sunday, April 15, 2012, along Miami Beach’s famed Ocean Drive.

In addition to his responsibilities for Pride, Pincente currently works and produces events for top-tier venues and well-known brands including, Space Nightclub, Miami, as general manager; Mova Lounge, Miami Beach, as operations and marketing consultant; Svedka Vodka, throughout Florida, as event producer; Source Events, Miami, as event manager; and the Surfcomber Hotel, Miami Beach, as event producer.  His previous experience in the hospitality industry has also included Crobar Nightclubs in New York City, Chicago and Miami Beach; Mia Biscayne, Miami; Exit 66 Nightclub, Ft. Lauderdale; and Cameo Nightclub in Miami Beach, where he has served in diverse operations, management, marketing, training and event-related capacities.

The mission of Miami Beach Gay Pride is to bring together members of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender community, their friends, allies, and supporters in celebration of the unique spirit and culture of the LGBT community by producing free, safe, quality mass-appeal events that are open to all, including the Parade, Festival and allied Miami Beach Pride sanctioned events. For more information; www.miamibeachgaypride.com.

Teacher Suspended for  Being Gay Porn Star

MIAMI, FL – In January, Shawn Loftis, a Miami-Dade County substitute teacher, was suspended from his position. In April, Loftis’ teacher’s certificate was revoked despite his insistence that his porn days were over.

Loftis also worked as a citizen reporter for CNN.

Loftis, who went by the stage name Collin O’Neal, resigned his porn career in 2010 but is still widely known for his porn work. His video work included Mirage, Lord of the Jungle, Humping Iron, Crossing the Line, Rising Sun, Desperate Husbands, Scorched, The Hard Way, Mo’ Bubble Butt, Perfect Fit and Skuff II: Downright Filthy.

However, Loftis/O’Neal also produced and directed his own series, known as “World of Men,” where, as O’Neal, he visited various exotic locations looking for sex. These locations included London, Lebanon, São Paulo, Miami, Spain, Edinburgh, Berlin and Serbia. O’Neal’s videos not only served as sex films, but were also travelogues showing some of the famous sites in the various cities. It is from these locations that, as Loftis, he submitted some of his iReport segments for CNN.

O’Neal’s hard-core performances won him several awards. The “World of Men” series has been nominated many times for awards and World of Men: Lebanon has won a GayVN Award for Best Pro/Am Release and a Grabby Award for Best Videography jointly for Collin O’Neal and Dan Fox, again for Lebanon.

O’Neal said that CNN knew about his porn past and didn’t have a problem with it, but can’t believe that the Miami-Dade School Board would, since he gave up the business.

Symposium on Aging

MIAMI, FL – The Miami-Dade Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce (MDGLCC) will hold a Symposium on Aging with the objective to educate and explore the needs of the LGBT community. The Symposium will be held on Saturday, September 24, from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m. at the Hyatt Regency Miami, 400 SE 2nd Avenue in Miami.

The Symposium on Aging seeks to open a discussion and create an understanding of the needs and expectations of this powerful and growing segment of the LGBT community.

The fee for admission, which includes seated lunch and refreshments throughout the day, is $35 for members of the MDGLCC and $55 for non-members. The event is open to the public. Limited space is available. RSVP required.

For complete details, visit www.gogaymiami.com (“Symposium on Aging” tab), call (305) 673-4440 or email mdglcc@bellsouth.net.

Jon Peterson to Appear at Miami Beach Stage Door Theater

MIAMI BEACH, FL – Starting on Saturday, September 10th, the Miami Beach Stage Door Theatre presents “Song Man Dance Man,” a one-man show about one-man shows created and performed by Jon Peterson, emcee from Broadway’s revival of “Cabaret” and Drama Desk Nominee for the title role in the off-Broadway production “George M. Cohan Tonight!”

“Song Man Dance Man” is about seven performers who captured the eyes, ears and hearts of their audiences. They are Fred Astaire and Gene Kelly, whose unique styles transformed the movie musical; Donald O’Connor and Sammy Davis, Jr., both geniuses who had to struggle for appropriate recognition; Bobby Darin, who made the leap from ‘50s pop-star to sophisticated concert artist; the eccentric, brilliant Anthony Newley, whose pulsating, emotional style reverberated throughout the musical theater world; and, of course, George M. Cohan, who invented the song and dance man.

“I wanted to remind people of just how good it can be; of how magical the world of show business was in those golden days because of these performers,” says Peterson about why he was motivated to create the one-man show. “The dazzling talent and charisma of these artists inspire life-changing devotion.”

“Song Man Dance Man” Performances: Saturdays at 2 and 8 p.m. on September 10, 17 and 24.  Tickets are $38 for the matinee and $42 for the evening performance and are available at the box office at Miami Beach Stage Door Theatre at the Byron Carlyle, 500 71st Street, Miami Beach, by calling (305) 397-8977 or purchase online at www.stagedoorfl.org.

Hamilton Gallery to  Host GLBX After Hours

FORT LAUDERDALE, FL – Hamilton Gallery at 615 East Las Olas Boulevard will be hosting the Gay and Lesbian Business Exchange (GLBX) After Hours Networking event on Thursday, September 22, from 5:30 to 7:00 p.m. GLBX is a Council of The Greater Fort Lauderdale Chamber of Commerce.  Exchange events are free for members.

“We plan our socials at various members’ businesses so we can enjoy a variety of venues and also give everyone the opportunity to learn first hand about that member’s business,” said Julian Cavazos, GLBX Chair. “We’re looking forward to meeting at Janice Hamilton’s Gallery.”

The Greater Fort Lauderdale Chamber of Commerce is the first Chamber in the State of Florida and one of the first in the nation to recognize the LGBT community as a major component of their membership. “The contributions of the Gay and Lesbian Community within our city and surrounding area is major driver to our local economy. The mission of the Chamber is to drive economic growth for the Greater Fort Lauderdale community; it was recognized that the Gay and Lesbian Community needed to be included in a manner to unite and connect, giving an inclusive voice to continue to attract new Gay and Lesbian businesses,” Mr. Cavazos explained.

For information or reservations, contact Drew Miller at (954) 462-6000 ext 8775.

South Florida Cities Rank Highest LGBT Households Concentrations

OAKLAND PARK, FL – Both Wilton Manors and Oakland Park ranked in the top-ten nationwide in the concentration of same-sex households in the United States. According to the 2010 U.S. Census, Wilton Manors ranked second in the nation with, 140 same-sex households per 1,000, and Oakland Park ranked tenth in the nation with 8.8 same-sex households for every 1,000. Provincetown, Massachusetts, came in first place, in front of Wilton Manors.

Sidelines Announces 3rd Round Cook-Off Winners

WILTON MANORS, FL – Sidelines Sports Bar held its last round of their Summer Cook-Off Competition before the Finals. The category for this round of the cook-off competition was Summer Salads.

The recipes included a candied pecan salad tossed with greens and a homemade dressing, a cauliflower and chicken salad, a couscous salad, a chicken salad with grapes and apples, to name just a few. However, Randy Harmon’s black-eyed pea pasta salad earned him first-place; John Woodward came in second-place and was also awarded the People’s Choice honor; Sonia Aguero came in third for her “Mama’s Potato and Chicken Salad”.

The top three winners are now eligible for the “Finals Challenge,” scheduled for Sunday, September 4th (Labor Day Weekend), at 5:00 p.m.

WIN to Hold  “Metaphysical Fair”

WILTON MANORS, FL – Women in Network (WIN) will be holding a Metaphysical Fair on Wednesday, September 7, at 7 p.m. at the Pride Center at Equality Park, 2040 N. Dixie Highway in Wilton Manors. Here’s your chance to ask what you never dared to ask before and your chance to learn more and speak to people who are experts in reiki, psychic ability, yoga, acupuncture and more. Admission is $5 for WIN members and $10 for non-members.

Rescue & Rejoice

WILTON MANORS, FL – Abandoned Pet Rescue will be holding Rescue & Rejoice, an event to raise funds since the organization is run solely on donations they receive. The fundraiser will be held at Allied Kitchen and Bath on September 13, from 6 to 8 p.m., and is co-sponsored by The Cabanas Guesthouse & Spa.

Abandoned Pet Rescue takes abandoned pets off the streets of South Florida and gives them veterinary care and places them in permanent, loving homes. APR is the only “no kill” shelter in Broward County and all contributions made are tax-deductible and all the proceeds go towards the shelter.

Suggested donations include gift certificates and other merchandise that will hold a value in an auction environment.
For more information on the Rescue & Rejoice event, or if your donation is something that needs to be picked up, please call Geri at (954) 581-6423 or send email to apr954@aol.com.

Florida Teacher in Trouble for Anti-Gay Facebook Posts

MOUNT DORA, FL – Jerry Buell, a Florida-based teacher, was suspended from the classroom while the Lake County School Board investigates Facebook messages in which he said he “almost threw up” when he heard about New York’s marriage equality, which he said was also part of a “cesspool”. Buell had been Mount Dora High School’s “Teacher of the Year”.
According to the Orlando Sentinel, Buell told them that his posts, which were visible to his friends and his network only, were not made out of hate but instead on how he interprets things.

In response to the Editor’s Column, “One Last Hit” in the Florida Agenda, July 28, 2011

Dear EDITOR,
I am responding your editorial regarding Amy Whinehouse and addiction. I really appreciated it. In December of 2009 I finally quit smoking after 25 years or so.

Decided that I didn’t want to do it anymore and I had it my head that I didn’t want to pick up another cigarette. I quit cold turkey and to this day I have not picked up a smoke. Why? Because I feel it was mind over matter. I have been to hypnosis, tried all the patches, you name it. How come I have been successful this time? The difference was because I didn’t want to smoke more than I want to smoke. That’s what I had in my head. To this day I still would love to have a cigarette, but I keep telling myself no!

Addictions come in many forms. I really believe this could be the case with any addiction, such as eating, gambling, drugs, alcohol or any other addiction, good or bad for you. I have a dear friend who is addicted to the gym. At least it’s a good thing. The bad part is that he would rather go to the gym then to dinner or meet up with his friends.

Rehab centers can only do so much for someone and do their best to try and change your train of thought, however, I believe, YOU have to be ready and YOU are the only one that can control your mind. I’ve been to AA and had alcoholic counseling before and I still drink…why? Because I don’t want to stop drinking more than I want a drink.

You have to want to do or not do something, more than the opposite to have any chance at achieving success. Once you have that in your mind, I believe you can be successful combating any addiction.

Great job!!

Anonymous

ALEX VAUGHN

This past Saturday, I was told the sad news that Amy Winehouse had been found dead in her London home.

I had the pleasure of meeting Amy a few times and she was very charming and very fun. I was so saddened to hear news of her passing and every report I read, including mine, mentioned her troubled life with addiction.

Sadly, that almost eclipsed a unique and heart wrenching vocal style and writing prowess that was striking in contrast to the pop factory styles that are being produced.

Other reports cited that, at 27, she was the same age as Kurt Cobain, Jimi Hendrix, Jim Morrison and Janis Joplin when they left us.

One has to wonder what pushes the talented to self-destructive lives. They have fame, money and get to go to work to do what they love.

Heath Ledger and Brittany Murphy, two other young people whom we lost too early. Michael Jackson, Elvis and Marilyn, too, all gone before their time.

Now, though Amy’s passing is at the time I’m writing this still unexplained, just the mention of her past provides light on a troubled soul.

Yet worryingly we don’t have to look to the rich and famous to see addiction and its disastrous consequences.

No, meth, heroin, rock, pot, coke, “e” and all manner of other ‘legal’ substances, such as a oxycodone, oxycontin and vicodin, are part of a large sector of the communities lives in our back yard. Miami, Tampa, Fort Lauderdale, Orlando … it doesn’t matter, there is a serious issue of addiction to drugs.

We see them in bars and clubs and even just walking down the Drive. They are sketchy – they look ill and like they haven’t slept for 2 days, which is highly likely. Times have changed, drugs of choice have shifted but the disastrous effects haven’t.

I wrote an opinion my second week at the paper and found that the LGBT community was more prone to addiction due to both their lack of self esteem and because they tended to be alone, and often aligned themselves with similar people.

I have unquestionably met people here who are under the influence of something other than a tini or two. I, too, have stood back watched, judged or, as is the London way, ignored.

Yet I have to reprimand myself … really? Knowing that someone two years younger than I has passed and the ‘assumption’ of how made me think, and I hope you too, if you know someone who is abusing any substance, it won’t make you popular, but get involved. You can help them and, at the risk of sounding preachy, you should.

As a community, we need to stick together. Party people may not think it will happen to them, but there are so many variables when doing drugs that many don’t know: quality, dose, what it’s cut with, adverse reactions, etc., and yet people blindly go aheadnot realizing the potentially fatal consequences.

Just think about it: In so many cases, people who OD have been doing drugs previously – often for many years – all it takes is one bad trip, one mistake and that’s it.

Not to mention, like alcohol – or even antibiotics – your body adjusts and the effects lessen, so one needs more and more; and, as we have all seen and read, that one more could likely spell the end of a talent, a star … A human being who didn’t need to be taken, all for one more hit, that ended being their last.

Drugs maybe fun; they may enhance sexual gratification, etc., but is that worth your life? If not for you, what about your friends, family, people who care, is it really worth it?

We have seen people letting drugs take over their lives, missing work, appointments and, unfortunately, the immediate reaction is the judgement ‘well what do you expect of a meth head?’ This is wrong – particularly when it comes from those who have been strong and wise enough to beat addiction. These people in many ways, more so than those of us who haven’t been affected by addiction need to stand up. Sadly, the reality is that you must work every day to keep away from drugs. Rehab is the best course of action, as the person can receive treatment across the board to help them change their mindset. If you are a recovering addict, don’t judge or be harsh to people you know. Remember, you were there once and, hopefully, someone reached out to you. Now is the time to pay it forward.

Sure they are in charge of their own lives, but as their friends, colleagues and even acquaintances, we need to reach out. Even a recreational user is in danger; you don’t have to be a tragic addict to die.

If you or anyone you know is affected by drugs there are a wealth of resources available to help you:
• Narcotics Anonymous, www.na.org, this comprehensive site enables you to find local NA meetings
• www.soberrecovery.com offers a range of recovery resources
• The Pride Institute of Fort Lauderdale Hospital offers a range addiction services. www.fortlauderdalehospital.org
• Lambda South, Fort Lauderdale Provides a meeting place primarily for gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgenders in recovery from a number of different addictions, www.lambdasouth.org
• The Pride Center offers a range of services for people in recovery, www.glccsf.org

By Sam Knew, MSW

If you go to the Apple store to look at pornography, you may have a problem

The internet is everywhere – our homes, work, phone, even free of charge at public libraries. That is why the nearly 4 million online users who identify themselves as online sexual addicts face a daily battle. It’s the internet’s accessibility and affordability that enables this form of addiction. This over-exposure of graphic and gratuitous sexual material can generate such an unhealthy attitude towards sex. And like most addicts, these individuals are capable of acting out with life-altering consequences.

Users compulsively access the “net” to download sexual images, visit sexually oriented chartrooms and participate in live sexual video acts – usually involving some form of masturbation. Many become isolated by shame, which  perpetuates the addiction.

Although defining this form of addiction may be challenging due to the degrees of use, most professionals will identify it as an addiction when it becomes unmanageable or all-consuming, costing users their own reality. Cyber addicts have been known to go online for hours or literally days at a time, risking their relationships, job and health.

The book In the Shadows of the Net: Breaking Free of Compulsive Online Sexual Behavior outlines five groups of users. The groups range from appropriate to inappropriate. Appropriate users include those who are capable of accessing sexual material online, even using it to enhance their real sex lives, and maintain a healthy, expressive sex life in their real world. Inappropriate groups include those who are at risk of becoming addicts, using the internet for exhibitionism or illegal sexual acts, such as meeting under-age sex partners. They tend to lack the ability to express their sexual desires in the real world, yet they are still in control of the image they project to the world (much like a functioning alcoholic).

The most severe group is made up of individuals who have some form of sexual addiction, and the internet is simply a tool in that addiction. They are detached from the real world and put themselves in numerous forms of high-risk situations in all aspects of their life. These users risk their jobs by viewing pornography at work. In addition, they jeopardize relationships, carrying on online fantasy relationships, some actually coming to fruition. This compulsion also takes its toll on the users’ physical and mental health, resulting in forms of depression and anxiety.

As with most addicts of any other addiction, users must learn to live with their disorder, as they are never truly cured. The goal is to create an environment where addicts can communicate their desires, and even fulfill them in healthy ways. Users need to understand the drive of their compulsion and learn to reconstruct their perception of sexual expression. Most importantly, they need to spend less time in their virtual world and more learning to cope in their reality.

Sam Knew, MSW is an educator and a local counselor. He can be reached at samknewmsw@gmail.com

A Hilarious comment? Or a worrying insight into the gay community’s dependence and abuse of alcohol?

Alex Vaughn

Undoubtedly, one of the most attractive elements to the gay scene in Florida is the unrivalled plethora of bars and clubs catering for everything from the neighbourhood bar, through to leather and strip joints. No matter your position in gay life there is a hot place for you with a killer drinks special! When I first came to Florida I rode the ‘specials’ wave and was shown the prevalence of alcoholism within the gay lifestyle. When do we ask where the line between a good time and a problem is?

Research has demonstrated, that at least two million gay men and lesbians abuse alcohol and as many as 30 per cent will need drug addiction treatment at some point in their lives. That is three times the odds facing

the general population. The bars are full of guys who seem to have lost so much as a result of excessive drinking; their looks, interests, hopes and dreams. Florida is undoubtedly the worlds gay playground, and within moderation or as a tourist that’s fine. However living here and pushing it too far, as I see so many gay people continue to do, only leads down one road; you will alienate friends and work colleagues and will become like so many of the lost souls here, who find that all they can do is turn to their barman, who they now consider their only friend, for a ‘Whiskey Lullaby’. Is this not a worrying status quo that needs addressing?

It’s very frightening that for a great many gay men and lesbians in Florida that line between a social drink and a regular drunken Tuesday has blurred into very dangerous territory. Alcoholism is going both untreated and ignored in the community. When looking at national statistics it is not surprising that gay men and lesbians are at risk of abusing alcohol or becoming dependent. Key social groups identified by the medical research board found those must likely to develop dangerous drinking habits include those; with easy access to alcohol (Fort Liquordale anyone?), low self-esteem or problems with relationships and those who live in a culture where there is a high social acceptance of alcohol.

Much of the lifestyle for gay people revolves around bars and clubs and with drinking being so very cheap here, as well as having a free pour society, many might not realise how close they are to the line of danger.

There is a school of thought that would blame the bars, another that would blame society for ‘forcing’ gay people to only feel comfortable at bars. The reality of course is sure, cheap drinks make it economically easier for people to drink more heavily than they would. Would you have as many cocktails at a bar if they cost $14 as they do in London? Society also has a influence in the fact that many gay people still feel they can only ‘belong’ in a gay bar.

However, unquestionably the responsibility lies at your door. Alcohol is one of the most addictive drugs on the planet and it seems the dangers are hugely ignored here in Florida. There are the obvious health risks and the psychological effects. You must also consider other dangers, if you are a drinker, you will agree that we have all done or said things we regret while under the influence, been belligerent in a bar, or engaged in dangerous practices. I have also seen the incidence of drunk driving here is astronomical. I recently was informed that if you get a DUI it will set you back a minimum of $10,000 and a night in jail! That’s provided you don’t cause an accident or worse a fatality. Is that worth an extra shot, or shelling out for a taxi?

We have to take responsibility for ourselves, blaming the ‘scene’ is not acceptable. We will say no to crack and many other substances and practices that are dangerous for us, but booze is just not one of them. We have to ask ourselves hard questions as to why we drink so excessively, life style is one answer. Internalised homophobia is something to consider. Insecurity, confidence, hiding, even drinking the pain of a lost love are all logical and prevalent causes. All of these need to be addressed. A community can easily come undone while an undercurrent of alcohol abuse and dependency is rife. In reading the questions asked by medical professionals below, I personally identified with some of them, and as a result I will be examining and undoubtedly changing my habits, perhaps you or a friend need to do the same.

Just remember excessive drinking and signs of likely dependence and abuse, is defined for men, as exceeding fifteen drinks per week and for women, exceeding twelve. Anyone who has had more than five drinks on one occasion in the last week is at risk as well. (One drink is equal to a 5oz glass of wine, 1 ½ shot of liquor or a 12oz beer) If we are honest we know that isn’t as much as it sounds on paper when you add it all up, and we have all exceeded the amounts, both in measures of alcohol and in quantities of drink.

Fortunately in Florida there are a great many resources for GLBT community, including the Pride Center at Equality Park who offer AA meetings. If you are worried about your drinking they offer an amazing range of services in a confidential and safe environment. For example on Thursdays they offer a ‘Smart Recovery Program’ for all addicitve behavior. This is a facilitated alternative to the twelve step program. If you visit their website you will see all meetings shown on the community calendar. You don’t have to do this alone.

This Presidents Day weekend, go to the bars, drink and celebrate, but do it in moderation and responsibly. The morning is always better without a hangover!

Alex Vaughn, is the Editor in
Chief of the Florida Agenda.
Alex can be reached at
editor@FloridaAgenda.com

The following questions are used by the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse
and Alcoholism to screen for alcohol abuse or dependence:
• Do you ever drive when you have
been drinking?
• Do you have to drink more than
before to get drunk or feel the desired
effect?
• Have you felt that you should cut
down on your drinking?
• Have you ever had any blackouts
after drinking?
• Have you ever missed work or lost a
job because of drinking?
• Is someone in your family worried
about your drinking?

If you are concerned about your drinking or someone close to you please
visit www.FloridaAgenda.com for a list of AA meetings and resources in your area and www.PrideCenterFlorida.org