I’ve never been one deeply moved by hip-hop music. Just ask my husband, who thinks hip-hop is essential to every task from washing clothes to reading the Bible. (Thank you Jesus.) And so when I was motivated by my husband to listen to Frank Ocean’s new album Blonde, I cannot be blamed for hesitating to cooperate. It was only after I discovered that his motivation took the form of withholding sex that I reconsidered listening to Mr. Ocean’s Blonde. I was not yet aware that the album had debuted at Number One on the Billboard charts. I knew it was highly anticipated, of course.

It had been four years, after all, since his first album blast onto the music scene with such adulation that even I could not ignore it. Channel Orange was a blend of soul, R&B and hip hop, a fusion that certainly got my attention, if only for its uniqueness. Frank Ocean’s lyrics peel back layers of emotions that are so normally in place that you feel they are essential. Or, at least, they are essential until he removes them and you feel exposed and liberated at the same time. It’s like what happens when you have a good cry—in public. There’s a certain humiliation about the experience but at the end of the day, you feel pretty doggone good about yourself. And so it is with Frank Ocean.

In addition to the lyrics, which are always supposed to say something meaningful and poignant, there is the unexpected music—some of which is so unobtrusive that it becomes soothing background music. And even when Frank finally sings his first line, it’s almost a whisper compared to other hip-hop artists’ hostility—jamming and pushing their curse words and crushed grammar down our throats as if we have no choice to accept it. Well, I have a choice, and I’ve, more often than not, refused to accept such trash as art. But this–this Blonde–art is art.

I guess I should have known that I would have a bond with this singer/songwriter/performer/lover. I had forgotten that years ago Ocean had admitted via Tumblr about the moment he realized that he was in love with a man. It was an outpouring so heart wrenching in its purity that I should have seen the genius inside at that moment.

“4 summers ago, I met somebody. I was 19 years old. ,” he wrote. “We spent that summer, and the summer after, together. Everyday almost. And on the days we were together, time would glide. Most of the day I’d see him, and his smile. I’d hear his conversation and his silence…until it was time to sleep. Sleep I would often share with him.  “By the time I realized I was in love, it was malignant. It was hopeless. There was no escaping, no negotiating with the feeling. No choice. It was my first love, it changed my life.

“Back then, my mind would wander to the women I had been with, the ones I cared for and thought I was in love with. I reminisced about the sentimental songs I enjoyed when I was a teenager.. The ones I played when I experienced a girlfriend for the first time. I realized they were written in a language I did not yet speak. I realized too much, too quickly. Imagine being thrown from a plane. I wasn’t in a plane though. I was in a Nissan Maxima, the same car I packed up with bags and drove to Los Angeles in.

“I sat there and told my friend how I felt. I wept as the words left my mouth. I grieved for them, knowing I could never take them back for myself. He patted my back. He said kind things. He did his best, but he wouldn’t admit the same. He had to go back inside soon, it was late and his girlfriend was waiting for him upstairs.”

I’m told that Frank Ocean has made $1 million from Blonde since its release only days ago. I now understand why. Thank you husband for the forced introduction.

The post Thoughts on Love and Frank Ocean appeared first on Florida Agenda - LGBT News.

It’s always strange to me to hear people talk about the “gay agenda.” Because undoubtably anyone who uses this term is anti-gay.

First of all, it’s important to remember that having an agenda isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Like when your boss asks you, “So, what’s on your agenda today?” she isn’t asking you what subversive things you’re planning on doing to ruin the company.

That said, the “LGBT community” is a misnomer. In reality, people who fall under the umbrella of LGBT are incredibly diverse in every way. There is no one thing that everyone agrees on, except maybe a desire to be treated fairly and equally under the law (though there’s no doubt far less consensus once you start talking about how to get there and what to do).

Which is why Americans For Truth About Homosexuality President Peter LaBarbera’s Aug. 19 “report” for Accuracy in Media, an organization that isn’t actually interested in accuracy so much as paranoid that the “liberal media” is out to get them, is so ridiculous.

In “Media Myths of the Homosexual-Transgender Agenda,” LaBarbera writes, “The purpose of this report is to expose and refute some of the longstanding statistical lies and propagandistic myths of the LGBT … activist movement. With media support, homosexual and leftist activists now openly campaign to banish dissenting conservative voices. This dangerous dynamic gives the homosexual-transgender lobby nearly full rein to advance its agenda.”

Ha. “Banish dissenting conservative voices,” eh? If he means that we think people who espouse the belief that LGBT people aren’t human and are incapable of love and unworthy of life don’t deserve TV air time and shouldn’t be a reporter’s go-to for an opposing viewpoint on every article about any LGBT issue, then yes, banish them. Let them assemble their banished selves in the dark realm of a place like Accuracy in Media or Americans For Truth About Homosexuality.

LaBarbera’s “report” doesn’t really offer anything new. It’s more like a “greatest hits” of anti-LGBT talking points: nobody’s born gay, sex-reassignment is mutilation, anti-gay reparative therapy works, homos die young, LGBT people make bad parents, etc.

But what I’m most interested in is what he calls “The 10% Myth.” LaBarbera tries to get to the bottom of just how many LGBT people there are in the U.S. The rough figure of 10% has been bandied about for years. LaBarbera writes, “The 10 percent myth served its purpose of projecting enormous ‘gay’ political strength when the movement was still weak.” In other words, the LGBT movement was just pretending to be 10% of the population for the political clout. And we all know that preceding to exist is a totally sound political strategy.

LaBarbera then throws out some other much smaller numbers eventually coming to the claim that LGBT people are about 3% of the population. To which I say, “Who cares?” Who cares what the percentage is? It’s not an easily ascertained or verifiable number. It’s as if LaBarbera is arguing that once a minority falls below a specific percentage then it’s okay to declare them inhuman.

And he is. Because for LaBarbera, LGBT people are inhuman. That is, in fact, the cornerstone philosophy of his hateful organization Americans For Truth About Homosexuality. The very name implies that homosexuals are liars; that homosexuality is something to be exposed as evil.

Then again, until we know the exact percentage of the U.S. population who are members of LaBarbera’s little club, how can we even be sure they even exist at all?

The post Peter LaBarbera appeared first on Florida Agenda - LGBT News.

By now, even if you don’t follow any kind of sportzball, you have heard about Colin Kaepernick, the San Francisco 49ers player who refused to stand during the National Anthem before a game.

His reasoning is pretty compelling. “I am not going to stand up to show pride in a flag for a country that oppresses black people and people of color,” he said. To me, this is bigger than football and it would be selfish on my part to look the other way. There are bodies in the street and people getting paid leave and getting away with murder.”

A fair point! Because that is the sad reality of racism in America. Naturally, Kaepernick’s protest was widely respected and elicited thoughtful debate across the country.

Ha ha. No. Actually, Kaepernick hates the police and wants to kill Whitey. At least that’s the word on the street. A street where everyone who lives there is white. Although maybe a few lawn jockeys here and there for, you know, decoration.

See, white people in America are really delicate flowers who can’t handle being reminded of the total fucking atrocities committed against people of color in this country for, like, ever. Oh and saying, “But I didn’t own slaves!” is not a get-out-of-racism-free card.

So, yeah, some people are really upset with Kaepernick because they fetishize the flag and that song about the flag to the point of absurdity. Like declaring that a totally valid protest is making Betsy Ross turn in her grave and why doesn’t that guy just get back to being a gladiator for our entertainment already.

Oh, and bravo to soccer player Megan Rapinoe who knelt during the National Anthem before a recent game in solidarity with Kaepernick.

“Being a gay American, I know what it means to look at the flag and not have it protect all of your liberties,” Rapinoe said. “It’s important to have white people stand in support of people of color on this.”

Right on. Almost makes me want to watch some soccer.

Not so right on is Laura Ingraham’s response to Kaepernick’s protest. She Tweeted on Aug. 30, “Good Q: What would have happened if Kapernick [sic] disrespected the rainbow flag bef the game?”

Which is actually not a good question at all because not only did she spell his name wrong, the comparison is illogical. As many people on Twitter have already pointed out.

Writer John Howell Harris responded, “b/c gay people have a nearly 300 year history of subjugation & institutionalized oppression of black people? Is that the Q?”

Now that is a good question.

Ingraham, who has called for people to start wearing adult diapers in order to protect themselves from the possibility of sharing a public restroom with a trans person and has said that being against marriage equality “doesn’t say that you’re anti-gay people or you don’t like gay people,” is obviously not expecting an answer to her rhetorical query. She’s posing the question in order to accuse liberals of choosing gays over America, because you can’t be pro-LGBT and love your country. Nor can you raise issues that make white people uncomfortable, which means anything related to racism, which is over because Obama, obviously.

It’s a consistent conservative trope: liberals/progressives hate America because they have the audacity to point out ways that America is not “great.” Of course, it’s okay when Donald Trump does it.

The truth is, America is a country with great ideals. It’s a shame that we still have yet to live up to them.

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LGBT people have heard the phrase, “Come out, come out, wherever you are” over and over again for decades now. The idea, of course, is that coming out of the closet is the only way to change hearts and minds about who and what LGBT people are. After all, it’s hard to hate, say, lesbians, if you find out that your favorite aunt or your sister or your favorite coworker is playing for Team Lez. You’ve got to at least take a step back and rethink all of the terrible assumptions you made and ideas you’ve had about lesbians, right?

Ideally, yes. And truth be told, the fact that the closet door is no longer the major barrier it once was for so many people (but not all people. We’ve got a long way to go still) has been key in advances in LGBT rights, especially over the last five to ten years.

But then there are always going to be people who have their minds made up and no amount of people meetin’ is going to change their minds no sir no how.

And one of those people is Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton.

On September 1st, Paxton had dinner at the home of a transgender boy. Now, in case you didn’t know, Paxton is not a big fan of trans folks. In fact, he’s pretty much a mosquito-bitten taint about the whole thing. He recently, along with attorney generals from other states, filed a lawsuit over the Obama Administration’s recommendations that trans students be treated like human beings while at school, for example. Paxton doesn’t want people he deems perverts to pee next to “normal” Texas children.

The family extended the invitation to Paxton hoping that meeting a real trans kid would “soften” his anti-trans stance.

And so Paxton went over to their house, broke bread with them, and had a come-to-Jesus moment where he wept about what a shit head he’d been and vowed to change his ways.

Ha ha ha. Just kidding. In reality, he went over to their house, ate their food, and then continued to be a trans-phobic prick.

He shows no sign of slowing his roll on the anti-trans lawsuits, for example. He wants Texans to be able to discriminate against trans people whether it’s in the bathroom or the doctor’s office. In his twisted morality play, it’s cool for doctors to be able to refuse to treat trans patients, and for trans men and women to stay out of public restrooms.

Which is why he’s in a fight with Target ever since the retailer announced that its trans guests and employees could use whatever restroom they deemed appropriate. Not in Paxton’s Texas! He warned in May that “allowing men in women’s restrooms could lead to criminal and otherwise unwanted activity.” Because he totally gets it!

And so Paxton must have been just thrilled to have his warnings come to fruition in the form of reports that on at least two different occasions, men in different Target stores were trying to take cell phone video of women in changing rooms.

The only logical conclusion: must be those trannies!

“After this latest incident, I hope Target finally recognizes the importance of protecting its customers, especially in environments where they can be at their most vulnerable,” Paxton said in a statement, alluding to his earlier “warnings” that trans men and women are perverted heathens who should have to cross their legs and be chained to their home toilet forever and ever amen.

But hey, at least he ate blueberry cobbler with a trans kid. What a hero.

The post Ken Paxton appeared first on Florida Agenda - LGBT News.

From a favorite source of mine, Merriam-Webster, the definition of ethics as:

* rules of behavior based on ideas about what is morally good and bad.

* an area of study that deals with ideas about what is good and bad behavior.

* a branch of philosophy dealing with what is morally right or wrong.

* a belief that something is very important.

They define responsibility as:

* the state of being the person who caused something to happen

* a duty or task that you are required or expected to do

* something that you should do because it is morally right, legally required, etc.

One of the things that seem to go hand in hand with getting older is lack of patience and a lower tolerance level of people who will say or do anything to anyone in order to get ahead, make themselves (seem to) look good.

The workplace can be loaded with people who feel entitled.  When they show up, it is to do as little as possible.  When they don’t show up it can be a burden on others, but it doesn’t seem to bother them.  Yet if someone else does the same thing, you would think a major crime had been committed.  What happened  to work ethics?

A person tells blatant lies about others whether it is in person or through social media.  They defraud others.  They show up in places and act out in unprofessional  ways.    They stalk people.  Many of the persons involved go to authorities and they’re all but blow off as if it were a minor issue or no big deal.  Once the person makes a threat to a whole community, all of a sudden the people who should have stepped up and taken action in the first place are now listening to what has been told to them all along.  Amazing how a handful of people are made to feel insignificant when they reach out to those who are supposed to serve and protect, yet when it escalates to a point it should never have reached, those  same people who should have  helped in the  first  place want to jump into action and look like heroes.  What happened to taking responsibility?

Friday night, September 9th, 2016, Democratic presidential nominee Hillary Clinton states (as reported by the New York Times):

“You know, to just be grossly generalistic, you could put half of Trump’s supporters into what I call the basket of deplorables. Right?” she said to applause and laughter. “The racist, sexist, homophobic, xenophobic, Islamaphobic — you name it. And unfortunately there are people like that. And he has lifted them up.”

“By Saturday afternoon, Mrs. Clinton had acknowledged her stumble. “Last night I was ‘grossly generalistic,’ and that’s never a good idea,” she said in a statement. “I regret saying ‘half’ — that was wrong.”

“She then used the opportunity to double down on her criticism of her opponent. “It’s deplorable that Trump has built his campaign largely on prejudice and paranoia,” she said, “and given a national platform to hateful views and voices, including by retweeting fringe bigots with a few dozen followers and spreading their message to 11 million people.”

Monday, September 12th, 2015, Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump states (according to abcnewsgo.com):

“After months of hiding from the press, Hillary Clinton has revealed her true thoughts. That was her true thoughts,” he said. “She revealed herself to be a person who looks down on the proud citizens of our country as subjects for her rule. She views it as her rule. ”

“Trump argued that a person should not run for president if he or she has “contempt in your heart for the American voter.”

“Hillary Clinton still hasn’t apologized to those she slanders,” Trump said. “In fact, she hasn’t backed down at all. She’s doubled down on her campaign conspiracy and contempt. If Hillary Clinton will not retract her comments in full, I don’t see how she can credibly campaign any further.”

“Trump said Clinton’s comments were the “most explicit attack on the American voter” from a major party presidential nominee.”

Of course, the supporters of each respective candidate will stand tall and firm by their woman or man, whether or not  you believe what they have said or will say.  Unfortunately, the worse may be yet to come.

I long for the days where ethics and/or taking full responsibility for what you’ve said  or done actually meant something.  It would be great to see everyone bring  them back.  It won’t make one look week or uncaring.  Just  human.

I leave you with the words of Albert Schweitzer:  “Ethics, too, are nothing but reverence for life. This is what gives me the fundamental principle of morality, namely, that good consists in maintaining, promoting, and enhancing life, and that destroying, injuring, and limiting life are evil.”

Rev. Joel S. Slotnick is an ordained Interfaith minister and full time digital court reporter. He can be found on Facebook and followed on Twitter.

Photo politico

The post Ethics & Taking Responsibility: Things of the Past? appeared first on Florida Agenda - LGBT News.

by Gary Resnick, Mayor of Wilton Manors

In this election, both candidates have talked a lot about defending and supporting our children and families. But only one candidate, Hillary Clinton, recognizes that a family is not always just a man and a woman, and understands that there are families of all backgrounds.

Representing the values that our generation and our community care about the most, Hillary Clinton knows that we are stronger together when we lift each other up so that everyone plays a role in creating America’s future. She has spent her life fighting for children and families of all backgrounds, and getting things done that are good for the community.  Hillary believes that LGBT parents deserve equal protections under the law, and when she was a U.S. Senator, she successfully advocated for an end to restrictions in New York blocking LGBT Americans from adopting children.

In Florida, we know these struggles firsthand.  Florida was the last state to legalize adoption by gay and lesbian couples, overturning legislation against gay adoption in 2010 and then codifying it into law in 2015.  As the Mayor of one the most LGBT celebrated communities in the nation, proudly named “the second gayest city in America,” I know that these are rights and freedoms earned through decades of struggle, and that we must fight to protect them.

In this election, there has not been a clearer choice for voters who believe in equality for all, regardless of their sexual orientation. The Republican candidate for Vice President, Mike Pence, previously described LGBT as a “lifestyle choice,” and consistently opposed marriage equality and other legal protections for the LGBT community and families. These are the types of people that Donald Trump has selected.

Donald Trump wants to “make America great” by turning back the clock to a time when the LGBT community was deprived of rights and freedoms, including the right to openly raise a family with the equal protection of the law.   The US Supreme Court narrowly determined that marriage equality is a Constitutional right.  With an opening pending and more to come on the Supreme Court, the President’s selection of Supreme Court Justices is incredibly important to our community.  As we recognize the 5^th year anniversary of the repeal of “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell,” let’s send a clear message that we are not going back in the closet and we are not going to be treated as 2^nd class citizens.

This election, we need to make sure our voices are heard, and that we support Hillary Clinton, the only candidate committed to defending and expanding our rights.  Three simple things you can do:  1) make sure that you are registered in Florida, 2) make sure your friends are registered in Florida; 3) VOTE!!! — make sure you and your friends vote – you can request an absentee ballot and vote by mail or early vote.  Once Early Voting starts, Wilton Manors City Hall will be an early voting site for anyone who lives in Broward County, or vote on Election Day, November 8.  You don’t have to wait until November 8 to exercise your Constitutional right to vote.

The post Hillary Clinton: The Only Candidate for LGBTQ Families appeared first on Florida Agenda - LGBT News.

Marriage equality in the US, the increase of gay affirming religious denominations, and some politicians openly pledging  to protect the rights of LGBTQ people are all wonderful advances for justice in our country, but there is more work to do. And, we can see easily enough that with these advances the political and religious extreme Right continues to work to slow and even reverse the progress that has been made.

The insults from the Right, especially those who claim to speak for “God” as they call gay people “sinners” and demean gay lives as a “lifestyle” may not pack the political punch they once did, but they are still ever present.

I completely (and publicly) reject the idea that same-gender love or attraction is in any way “sinful.” Often, the response to my not accepting a sub-human status is for anti-gay religionists to quote some bible verse at me (as if I just never ran across those verses in seminary or in my ministerial career). When belching a bible verse at me like a sorcerer’s curse doesn’t zap me straight (or at least render me contrite for being gay), bible bullies will often deliver this all too familiar spiritual sucker punch: “We’ll have to agree to disagree.”

The attempted set up in such a situation is to suggest that if same-gender loving people can’t smile when being attacked, then there must be something horribly wrong with us. I don’t think so. They’re trying to sell it, but I ain’t buying it.

I will disagree with someone who says a verse here or there from an ancient text proves that I’m pond scum, but I will not agree that our disagreement is merely two opposing but equally valid views. My sacred value is not a matter for debate; it is the one thing about which I am completely unwilling to compromise.

The fact is that a significant percentage of every population in every era of human history (and in animal populations as well) develop same-gender love and attraction, and are probably biologically predisposed to do so. This isn’t new information. The Kinsey Reports of the 40s and 50s, Dr. Evelyn Hooker’s research in the late 50s, the American Psychiatric Association in 1973, the American Psychological Association in 1975, and every major mental health organization (including the World Health Organization) in the west and many throughout the world have confirmed this.

There is nothing aberrant, disordered, immoral, wicked, or shameful about mutually beneficial and agreed upon relationships. The gender identities of those in a relationship are not what make those relationships sacred.

The simple truth is that some people are gay, it’s perfectly natural for them, and it harms no one to acknowledge that. Period.

LGBTQ people are a wonderful part of the glorious diversity of the world. Being gay is one my blessings and I give thanks for the life I share with the person I love.

Religion should never be used to make people feel ashamed of who they are, and it certainly shouldn’t be used to punish genuine, mutually shared love. Religion at its best will affirm the inherent dignity of all people. That is, at least, the religion I try to practice and the religion I wish to share.

Rev. Dr. Durrell Watkins is the author of Saved From Salvation (available at Amazon.com) and is the senior minister of Sunshine Cathedral in Fort Lauderdale.

The post My Sacred Value Is Not a Subject for Debate appeared first on Florida Agenda - LGBT News.

In a word, Ethos Greek Bisto is  Fantastikós. Fantastic.

In this city where there’s a Thai restaurant on every third corner, the opening of a Greek restaurant on Wilton Drive is cause for celebration. We’re not talking about breaking plates on the floor and holding hands dancing the Kalamatianós. We’re talking about a celebration of healthy food where the platters arriving from the kitchen are a mosaic of colors and aromas that looks as fresh and healthy as they are.

True to every Greek menu is an assortment of wonderful spreads, served with toasted pita bread. Our favorite is the Zesty Creamy Feta with the roasted red pepper. But then, Ethos serves some of the best Hummus around as well, albeit heavy on the garlic…but oh so delicious.  $6.00 a plate and enough to share around the table.

For those who don’t know Greek Dakos, the version served at Ethos is as flavorful as any we’ve ever experienced in Crete from where this dish originates. It’s a Greek-style brochetta that uses a hardened bread called rusk which is topped with tomato puree and feta cheese, plus basil. Ask for some chopped olives to complete the taste and be sure to pass around. $9.

Speaking of sharing, the best way to get an instant sample of all the spreads as well as other popular dishes at Ethos is through its Taste of Ethos Silver or Gold assortment platters. In the Silver Sampler, enjoy the various spreads, a Greek salad (with vine ripe tomatoes, cucumbers, onions, peppers, feta, kalamata olives, house greens, red wine vinegar & olive oil), stuffed grape leaves (a Greek classic with rice, herbs and lemon sauce), and the meat platter of gyro, grilled chicken, pork tenderloin, grilled kefte rice, and wedged potatoes. At $21 per person, (with a minimum of two persons), it is the bargain taste treat. The Gold Sampler adds two lamb chops to the mix for an extra $6.00.

For a slighter smaller dish in plate size if not quantity, try the Surf and Turf (pictured), two full-sized lamb chops with shrimp saganaki—a shrimp over rice dish named after the skillet in which it is cooked. Separating the portions is some lovely grilled eggplant. Magnificent. $26.

Every Greek restaurant has at least one version of Calamari, and at Ethos you’ve got your choice of two—Grilled (on a bed of sautéed red cabbage) for $11, and Fried (dusted with seasoned flour and served with red marinara sauce for $10. The Grilled Octopus at $14 is sashimi grade and charred to perfection.

The ambiance of Ethos is sophisticated stonework and well-polished wood with a long, packed bar on the south side of the restaurant and an exposed kitchen to the west. The skilled servers, including our own fresh-faced John, were school in the food and steeped in Greek history. From the look through the kitchen’s glassed front, it is a well-run place with a choreographed display of grilling, slicking and plating that needs only an orchestration to be its own show.

Unfortunately for Ethos, its major downfall is its very design. Planned throughout to allow intimate seating for two or four, and with gentle lighting that says romance in tones of orange and gold, Ethos drops the ball in its music level, which is so high that customers try to overcome the sound my speaking louder.  The perfect setting for a lingering feast with a loved one, and the kind of fabulous food we would cherish to consume often is overwhelmed by a noise level that is disturbing in its intensity.  A request to manager Jamie Logue to lower the music brought only a temporary respite, for all too soon, it was re-upped with the spirited and glamorous crowd right with it.

Plan to make a stop at Ethos Greek Bistro. Go early before the crowd gets too loud…and be sure to them that the Agenda sent you. Fantastikós. (2055 Wilton Drive, Wilton Manors, FL  754-999-0034)

The post Ethos: Greece comes to Wilton Manors appeared first on Florida Agenda - LGBT News.

The  numbers:  They’re disgraceful.

The sources: The Broward Supervisor of Elections www.browardsoe.gov

Miami-Dade: http://results.enr.clarityelections.com/FL/Dade/63175/174997/en/summary.html

The culprit:  People who chose not to vote. 

Broward:  (Website last updated at: 08/31/2016 9:43:58 am)

Registered Voters:

1,135,846

Ballots Cast:

187,640

Voter Turnout:

16.52%

Miami-Dade:  (Website last updated 8/31/2016 12:16:19 AM EDT)

Registered Voters:     

 1,307,473

Ballots Cast:  

267,678

Voter Turnout:

20.47 %

For Broward:  There was early voting.  Granted, it was one week instead of two, but from August  20th at 10:00 a.m. to August 28th, 7:00 p.m., polls were open.  There is what’s now called Vote By Mail, formerly Absentee ballot.  I got mine over a month ago.  Lastly we had Primary day, which was August  30th, 7:00 a.m.- 7:00 p.m.

I have talked with quite a few people in person and on social media, since the August 30th primary elections.  Aside from myself, there are quite a number of dumbfounded persons who don’t understand why people don’t vote. Some were quite colorful, even possible solutions.  Some of those  comments:

“Lazy @#& fools that were afraid to get wet….I went out in the POUR @%#& RAIN to VOTE!!! Then they want to cry the blues when $h#t doesn’t go their way!!! GO LIVE IN A DICTATORSHIP COUNTRY WHERE YOU CAN NEVER VOTE YOU #)!*$ !!!”

“What a disgrace! I just don’t understand… Please explain.”

“This always shocks me, I’m lost for words. Very sad.”

“So pathetic. You can’t have a democracy work with a bunch of non-voters.”

“I bet if the penalty was no social media for 6 months there would be 100 percent”

“People complain about our politicians but don’t bother to vote … they should just shut up.”

“I know this sounds radical, but I do support a Constitutional duty to vote. We may need to add a column to every race that says “neither” but I think if you want to be a citizen in good standing, barring some good reason, you should vote in every election. For me, that is the bare minimum we should expect from any citizen.”

In my eyes, a primary is just as important  as a “big” election.  I see it geared more to our state & local issues/persons:  Governors, Senators, Mayors, Commissioners, Counsel persons, judges, school board officials, etc.  What in God’s name is so unimportant people don’t feel it’s necessary to vote?  Do people think  Florida is in such a state of grandeur  that some don’t care who gets elected?  Lord, I hope not!

But looking at the numbers, they don’t seem to care.   Why do people feel it is something that makes no difference?   I have yet to get an answer what makes believe it doesn’t matter about the ones that make some very important decisions on their behalf, possibly about them, definitely about their life.

This lack of exercising a necessary privilege and civic duty has to stop!  This is 2016 when so many people are fighting for basic human and civil rights.  I wonder how non-voters  would feel about losing their right to vote.  That awaits the  $64,000,000 answer.

People don’t realize not voting is tantamount to electing many of the wrong people.  Many  of today’s issues already prove that.  I have hopes the November numbers will  be a vast improvement.

And for those of you who will continue to not vote, there is JUST NO EXCUSE. Shame on you!

I leave you with the words of President Abraham Lincoln:  “Elections belong to the people. It’s their decision. If they decide to turn their back on the fire and burn their behinds, then they will just have to sit on their blisters.”

Rev. Joel S. Slotnick is an ordained Interfaith minister and full time digital court reporter. He can be found on Facebook and followed on Twitter.

Photo sun-sentinel

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So there we are, all of us bundled together as LGBTQ (and XYZ for all I know). Although I’ve discussed this before, in case you’ve forgotten, among that alphabet soup, I’m officially a B, as in Bisexual, as in feeling more or less the same with women as with men.  Love ‘em all.

That fact is more than a little upsetting to my husband, who sees the way women cruise me in the local Publix. He’s only too happy to point out my wedding ring (and his) to all those who glance my way—no introductions needed.

He is officially a G in the mix, and highly protective of his B. I always thought of it as cute, until recently that is.  Just this week, a new study was released, commissioned by the world famous Adam and Eve Adult Toy Company of Carrboro, North Carolina. You know, the ones who make all those clever items that are sold by Hustler and other adult purveyors. Like the Clone-A-Willy Kit which allows you to make a perfect rubberized duplicate of our penis for $44.95. In any case, I digress.

Adam and Eve commissioned Dr. Maria Pallotta-Chiarolli from Deakin’s School of Health and Social Development to ask 1,000 adults what they thought about having a relationship with a bisexual. I was shocked to discover that all these years, I had over-memorialized my skill at seduction.

According to the study, nearly half of those polled (47%) said they wanted nothing to do with a bisexual, regardless of how handsome or physically fit he might be. We were just knocked off the list because we apparently made ourselves too available to, well, everyone.

The good news was that 35% of the group actually thought the idea of hooking up with a bisexual was rather like a special treat. Like homemade pistachio sorbet, only different. And then there were those 19% who couldn’t decide whether they would like it or not. (But since I’m certain that some simple seduction would bring them around, I’m willing to commit that a full 50% would find a bisexual half in a relationship just dandy.

But it’s that other 47% that worry me. (Stick in the muds if you want my opinion.)  There was some small consolation when Dr. Maria said that of the group who would welcome a bisexual in the master bedroom, there were more men than women who felt that way (39% versus 31%). Additionally, 23% of the women and 15% of the men were unsure when surveyed. They really can’t be counted since they’re just “confused,” as my Aunt Dorothy used to say.

In any case, there was more good news when the study was reflected upon slowly. According the Dr. Pallotta-Chiarolli, many of the women praised the “emotional depth, sexual intimacy and equitable gender dynamic of their mixed-orientation relationship”, with some actually sharing the reality that they would never be with a heterosexual man again. Suddenly I’m feeling much better.

The Doctor’s new book is titled Women in Relationships with Bisexual Men – Bi Men By Women. And according to Pallotta-Chiarolli, “Through this research and book, it is my hope that we can stop presenting only the stereotypical story.”

Stereotypical story? About bisexuals? Reading a bit deeper into the book, I discovered to my absolute astonishment that it is generally believed that bisexuals (in other words, me) are “untrustworthy and have secret affairs; that all bisexual men transmit HIV and STI to women; and that all bisexual men are abusive to their women partners.” What? I should sue. Nothing short of character assassination, I tell you.

“While we found these issues are certainly out there and we don’t shy away from discussing them, we need to lift the stigma for the women who choose to be in relationships with bisexual men and indeed say that bisexual men make better lovers and fathers,” Pallotta-Chiarolli added.

Well, that part is true. We do make better lovers and fathers. If you don’t believe me, ask my husband.  Just look for the French Creole flashing his wedding ring.

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