Tallahassee, FL – A federal judge and U.S. Appeals court have rejected Mark “Chris” Sevier’s motion to intervene in Florida’s same-sex marriage case in order to marry his “porn-filled Apple computer,” according to a statement made by Sevier, reported by Miami New Times.

Sevier says in the statement that if gays “have the right to marry their object of sexual desire, even if they lack corresponding sexual parts, then I should have the right to marry my preferred sexual object.”

His 24-page filing states that after a while, Sevier began to prefer sex with his computer rather than the real thing.

“Over time, I began preferring sex with my computer over sex with real women,” he stated. “Naturally, I ‘fell in love’ with my computer and preferred having sex with it over all other persons or things, as a result of classic conditioning upon orgasm.”

Judge Robert Hinkle stepped in to squash the motion, stating that it has no place in the lawsuit for marriage equality.
“Chris Sevier has moved to intervene, apparently asserting he wishes to marry his computer,” Juge Robert Hinkle wrote in a statmenet. “Perhaps the motion is satirical. Or perhaps it is only removed from reality. Either way, the motion has no place in this lawsuit.”

Sevier is now attempting to intervene in Utah’s battle for marriage equality.

“Those of us whose sexual orientation has been classically conditioned upon orgasm through the staight forward science of dopamine to prefer sex with inanimate objects and animals do not have public support, like the gays, so we are especially vulnerable here,” he wrote in a new 50 page brief for his intervention in Utah.