By ROBERT ELIAS DEATON

The Canary Islands sit off the coast of Northwest Africa some 60 miles from Morocco but, otherwise, a world away. The Spanish archipelago is composed of seven major islands, all watched over by its own patron saint, the Virgin of Candelaria, who has her hands full—particularly in Playa del Inglés, the largest resort town in the group. Here, being gay is not only accepted, it’s expected. Let me explain.

All of the Canaries, as the islands are collectively known, have a live-and-let-live lifestyle that manifests itself in a joy so contagious that straights, gays, transsexuals, and bipolars rub hips, lock lips and otherwise enjoy each other’s company without the slightest hint of judgment. Playa del Inglés on Gran Canaria (the second most populated of the islands) takes carpe diem to the extreme with a nude beach and sand dunes to frolic by day, and a 200 store/ bar shopping mall called the Yumbo Centrum to get naughty by night. But first things, first. You get to the Canary Islands via flights to Las Palmas Airport (LPA).

Playa del Inglés

From the airport, known locally as Gando, you can catch a cab to Playa del Ingles for 35 euros, or take the five euros #66 public bus if money is tight. Either way, it’s a short 20-minute trip. The Riu Palace Maspalomas Hotel (Avenida Tirajana, Plaza Fuerteventura) is always a good choice for a place to stay. It’s the closest hotel to the sand dunes and the gay beach (located near beach stand #7)—just follow the pack of boys in thongs. It’s a ten minute walk to Yumbo Centrum (Avenida de Espana), a four-story tourist trap of stores and restaurants during the day that turns into a gay mecca at night. After 10 p.m., the bars take control of the place, with each trying to outdo the other with music and drink specials, backrooms and black lights. The dress code in the evening is, well, minimum— as in, the less you have on the better. Nearly all the gay bars at Yumbo are clothing optional. The only item required is footwear, which should tell you something.

You can float from bar to bar, wearing only your underwear, which is about as carpe diem as you can get. Most clubs charge five euros cover, which includes a free drink. At The Cellar, on the ground floor, Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Fridays are Underwear night (that’s the maximum you can wear), Thursday night you’ll find Naked in the Dark (no explanations needed), Saturday is Jock Strap night while Sunday is Shoes Only. The Cellar knows how to throw a party. On the first floor, Cruise Bar is the oldest gay club in town. Its theme is leather, the mood is dark, and the place is packed until 6 a.m., so they must be doing something right. Upstairs on the fourth floor is Club Mykonos, with an enormous dance floor, and a motto that reads “If You’re Not Having Sex, See One of Our Staff for Assistance.”

Think of it as Greek by way of Spain, Canary style. The local Gay Pride runs from May 7 through 12. There’s a traditional parade on the final day running smack through the middle of town on the Avenida Tirajana. This year’s theme is Countries of the World, so you’ll fit right in even if you call Florida home. The entire event climaxes at the Yumbo Centrum (where else?) and it’s a 24/7 type of party—not unlike the Canary Islands itself. And remember, the Virgin of Candelaria has your back.