By Nicholas Snow

Meet “Yuky,” a thirty-something gay man from Istanbul, Turkey, and the creator of the web site, Istanbul Queens, a gay and lesbian travel guide. Yuky who is from a “modern and liberal, sensitive to the environment” family came out at age 18 to one of his close straight friends that he performed with in a theater group. Fifteen years later, while out to close friends and some family, Yuky remains anonymous in the media.

About homosexuality in Istanbul, Yuky explained, “No one can arrest you because of walking hand in hand or kissing each other in public. However, it is generally not very acceptable by the people except in some areas like Ni?antasi (high society district), Taksim, and Beyoglu.” Beyoglu, Yuky explained, is in the heart of Istanbul and known for shopping, dining, cafes, bars, restaurants, clubs, art galleries, antique shops, bookstores, and most importantly, people, including students, expats, tourists, and locals young and old.

According to Yuky, Turkish law states that everyone is equal without distinction of any kind such as race, color, sex, language, religion, political or other opinion, national or social original, property or other status – but this is not the case in reality. As reported internationally there is a great deal of trans-phobia in Turkey and there have been high profile murders of transsexuals.  Also, soldiers discovered to be gay are subjected to “a psychological test period and meetings” and then expelled from the military and not allowed to work for the government either.

Yuky advises tourists quite sensibly “not to be very open and not to invite people to their own place when they first meet,” and he also helps people identify the places in the city where comfort and tolerance levels are higher. Yuky recommends IstanbulQueens.com, his Gay & Lesbian Travel Guide for travel info. His blog (istanbulqueens.blogspot.com) has received visits from people in 143 countries since launching in May of 2009.

“I work alone,” said Yuky, who relies on his friends and supporters to help keep him updated. There is a lot to offer in Istanbul, such as shopping tours, river cruises, events and parties, as well as a gay night tour. He does not recommend the local gay sauna because he reports that it is dirty and has many “rent boys” inside, but does suggest two Turkish baths that are “not gay” but are “clean, small and nice” with traditional baths, foam massage and body scrubbing.

There are many gay bars in Istanbul (which are legal), some of which are identifiable by rainbow flags, and one club offers its own version of a dark room, this one called a Red Room. One gay club, formerly an opera theater, is known for its shows.

Yuky estimates that only 10-15% of gays in Turkey are open about their sexuality with most – especially those working in the military or government – staying in the closet. He also indicates that gays who live in “traditional neighborhoods” will remain closeted because, basically, everybody minds everybody else’s business.

Istanbul seems to have one thing in common with most cities in the world in my opinion, as Yuky explained, “Dating scene is very strange in Istanbul. When I talk to people, they want to have a relationship but they are not ready for a relationship as they are selfish and not ready to share their time, their life, and their secrets with someone – [they are] not respectful to the relationship. They are looking for relationships and end up with sex.” Popular online dating sites in Istanbul are the internationally popular GayRomeo.com and Manjam.com and a local website, Gabile.com.

Yuky has been lucky in love, having met his partner on a gay dating site ten years ago, and they have lived together for eight and a half years. Quite romantically, Yuky explained, “[We] did not see any photos of each other and did not know [our] sexual preferences until we met. The strange thing is, I did not like blond guys and he did not like dark-skinned guys.

But love makes you like anything.”
As for his own hopes and dreams for his life in Turkey as a gay man, Yuky confided, “I don’t expect much more than I have now. I would love to be open to my family and not to be expected to get married by people around me.”

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