By AJ Cross
1) Have a budget!
Go-Go Bars are designed for compulsive mentalities; when you get there thinking you will only spend $20, the temptation and the “wow” compels you to spend more and more. Decide on how much you can afford to spend and then only bring that amount with you.
What to consider? Parking, cover,
beverages, tips, VIP Rooms – and possible cab fare if you drink too much.
2) Place your wallet in front pockets or inside pocket of your jacket!
Often times while sitting on a bar stool or in the VIP Room, wallets fall out and by the time you realize you do not have your wallet it is too late and you have unwillingly contributed to someone’s college fund.
3) Bring Sanitizer Gel or Wipes.
This suggestion is self-explanatory.
4) Be realistic!
Remember that, much like an attorney, doctor or therapist, time is money. Even if the performer is genuinely interested in you, he is there to earn money, so make sure to be in a compensatory state of mind.
5) Take advantage of the bathroom attendant!
If you are NOT supposed to be at a Go-Go Bar for whatever reason, make sure that you visit the restroom and use mouthwash, lotion and cologne. The person waiting for you at home will not believe you were at Midnight Mass if you smell like smoke, alcohol, musk or anything south of the border.
6) Bring a keychain flashlight!
This will come in handy when inspecting the chair you’re about to sit on in the VIP Room to make sure you will not get gum or DNA on your pants.
7) You can’t find love!
If you are looking for love in a Go-Go Bar… DON’T! The likelihood of finding a “Pretty Woman” scenario is not high.
Have you heard the expression that you “can’t turn a Go-Go Dancer into a housewife”? Well that’s not the exact expression, but you get the point.
8) Do your research!
Ask around or look for online blogs about the specific bars you are considering. The best advertising is people like you, so find out what people are saying. If the overall consensus is that a bar has hot guys, good drinks and a fun atmosphere, then you are probably going to enjoy yourself.
9) Where am I?
If you are visiting and alone, carry the address of your hotel or wherever you are staying with you, just in case you drink too much and need a cab. This will help security or anyone else communicate your destination to the driver so that you get home safe.
10) No Means No!
These boys are professionals and have rules and laws to follow, so when they say NO, do not test the water and end up in an unpleasant situation with the performer or security. Waking up in a dumpster after getting your butt kicked sucks!
11) Compensation!
There is only one currency at Go-Go Bars. I have seen people try to tip performers with candy, calling cards and, one time, even food stamps. Cash, cash, cash or the occasional diamond watch or new car are acceptable forms of compensation.
AJ Cross
